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things NOT to ask/say to a baker! - Page 12

post #166 of 2784

All these folks with their knotted knickers trying to get this thread shut down. I've got something for ya. Gimme a few minutes. **Returns the simple syrup to the stove and sets candy thermometer to 245F**icon_twisted.gif

post #167 of 2784

Hahahaha!  OK I have another one:

 

Marble.

 

icon_confused.gif

 

Take a bite of chocolate, don't swallow, take a bite of vanilla... chew and swallow.  Voila!  Marble!  Why do I have to bake a special little sample of cake that is just chocolate and vanilla cake baked in the same pan when I've already given the client CHOCOLATE AND VANILLA cake samples?  Is the flavor really that special and complex that some magical transformation happens when those two batters are baked together that completely change the flavor profile from just taking a bite of vanilla cake then taking a bite of chocolate cake and using your imagination that they were baked all in the same pan?

 

Don't know why this one drives me nuts.

post #168 of 2784
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dayti View Post

Customer: I see you have a ten portion minimum on all your cakes.

Me: Yes, that's right.

Customer: Well, there are only 4 of us.

Me: You could just cut it into 4 pieces. Or have some the next day, everyone loves leftover cake!

Customer: So if there are only 4 of us, will the price be the same?

Me: *shaking head and wondering whether to just hang up* Yes, the price would be the same, no matter how many pieces you cut it into.

Customer: And does it all have to be the same flavour cake and filling?

Me: Yeah, how about I make 4 different flavoured 6" cakes, torte them, and give you one half layer of each flavour, and I then sandwich them together with 3 flavours of buttercream, and ganache in white AND dark chocolate, just to keep ALL 4 of you REALLY happy.

 

OMG I just had someone that did that to me!  She wanted 4 different flavors of cake and 4 different buttercreams - in a 6" cake!

post #169 of 2784
Thread Starter 

have you ever had someone ask you about cake, have a consultation and in that consultation they say "yea, I normally make the cakes but I don't have the time this time around".

 

I had this happen to me...I make a spectacular cake, and when I bring it over she is OBVIOUSLY jealous! why would someone do this to themselves icon_lol.gif

It's not "just" cake...it's my life!
WI State Representative for Icing Smiles...start 'Baking a Difference" today!
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It's not "just" cake...it's my life!
WI State Representative for Icing Smiles...start 'Baking a Difference" today!
Reply
post #170 of 2784
Quote:
Originally Posted by FromScratchSF View Post

Hahahaha!  OK I have another one:

 

Marble.

 

icon_confused.gif

 

Take a bite of chocolate, don't swallow, take a bite of vanilla... chew and swallow.  Voila!  Marble!  Why do I have to bake a special little sample of cake that is just chocolate and vanilla cake baked in the same pan when I've already given the client CHOCOLATE AND VANILLA cake samples?  Is the flavor really that special and complex that some magical transformation happens when those two batters are baked together that completely change the flavor profile from just taking a bite of vanilla cake then taking a bite of chocolate cake and using your imagination that they were baked all in the same pan?

 

Don't know why this one drives me nuts.

Oh, that reminds me of another one. "I wanted to know if my fiance can come over to try some of the samples since it's been a while since we booked. He wanted to try the chocolate and vanilla again." Makes me want to ask them if they've ever eaten chocolate or vanilla before and if they know what it tastes like.

post #171 of 2784
Customer- long sob story how she really can't afford the kind of cake she wants so she found me hoping to get a great deal on a specialty cake.
Me- feeling sorry for her quote her a dirt cheap price
Customer- oh thank god I can afford that..now I also want 2 dozen cupcakes in two different flavors
Me- ok that will be extra
Customer-really? Remember I can't afford much
Me- than you just want the cake no cupcakes?
Customer- no I want both just say with my budget
Me- ( big sigh) yeah I understand want you wan t
post #172 of 2784
Quote:
Originally Posted by vgcea View Post

All these folks with their knotted knickers trying to get this thread shut down. I've got something for ya. Gimme a few minutes. **Returns the simple syrup to the stove and sets candy thermometer to 245F**icon_twisted.gif
Can you just make peanut brittle instead I have a craving and I have a broken foot so I can't stand Long enough to make it.
Lol how much will this request cost me? And please remember I have a budget
post #173 of 2784

Well, they might want to make sure your marble cake doesn't come out the consistency of a block of marble. That was, after all, my own biggest concern, the first time I made my strawberry marble cake. And of course, anything added to the batter can screw up the chemistry, so it doesn't all rise evenly (my strawberry marble doesn't; the strawberry veining is slightly, but visibly, depressed.)

 

And for that matter, who says a marble cake has to be chocolate marble? There's strawberry marble, and besides, spice marble, by all accounts, was the very first marble cake.


Edited by hbquikcomjamesl - 12/13/12 at 8:42pm

James H. H. Lampert
Professional Dilettante

Web site: http://www.hbquik.com/jamesl

Flickr "baked goods" set http://flic.kr/s/aHsjvZvdTh

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James H. H. Lampert
Professional Dilettante

Web site: http://www.hbquik.com/jamesl

Flickr "baked goods" set http://flic.kr/s/aHsjvZvdTh

Reply
post #174 of 2784

Quote:

Originally Posted by vgcea View Post

All these folks with their knotted knickers trying to get this thread shut down. I've got something for ya. Gimme a few minutes. **Returns the simple syrup to the stove and sets candy thermometer to 245F**icon_twisted.gif

 

Originally Posted by kazita View Post


Can you just make peanut brittle instead I have a craving and I have a broken foot so I can't stand Long enough to make it.
Lol how much will this request cost me? And please remember I have a budget

 

I don't have much money, only what I got selling the umbrella I was going to give to Jason, but can you send me two dozen cupcakes along with some of the brittle?

icon_biggrin.gif

There. Their. They're not the same.

 

I hope I die before "your" becomes the official contraction of "you are."

Reply

There. Their. They're not the same.

 

I hope I die before "your" becomes the official contraction of "you are."

Reply
post #175 of 2784
Hopefully those cupcakes will be. MOIST lol
post #176 of 2784

I want them soggy.

There. Their. They're not the same.

 

I hope I die before "your" becomes the official contraction of "you are."

Reply

There. Their. They're not the same.

 

I hope I die before "your" becomes the official contraction of "you are."

Reply
post #177 of 2784
Quote:
Originally Posted by FromScratchSF View Post
Take a bite of chocolate, don't swallow, take a bite of vanilla... chew and swallow.  Voila!  Marble!  Why do I have to bake a special little sample of cake that is just chocolate and vanilla cake baked in the same pan when I've already given the client CHOCOLATE AND VANILLA cake samples?  Is the flavor really that special and complex that some magical transformation happens when those two batters are baked together that completely change the flavor profile from just taking a bite of vanilla cake then taking a bite of chocolate cake and using your imagination that they were baked all in the same pan?

 

Well, if you mixed the two too thoroughly, you might get camel and I know people eat those but I don't know what they taste like. Probably wouldn't be too sweet. icon_wink.gif

There. Their. They're not the same.

 

I hope I die before "your" becomes the official contraction of "you are."

Reply

There. Their. They're not the same.

 

I hope I die before "your" becomes the official contraction of "you are."

Reply
post #178 of 2784
Quote:
Originally Posted by shanter View Post

I want them soggy.


GROSS!!!
post #179 of 2784
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by shanter View Post

I want them soggy.

icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif

 

I get so many people asking me about fondant and that "texture". well that's definitely the opposite of soggy ;) 

It's not "just" cake...it's my life!
WI State Representative for Icing Smiles...start 'Baking a Difference" today!
Reply
It's not "just" cake...it's my life!
WI State Representative for Icing Smiles...start 'Baking a Difference" today!
Reply
post #180 of 2784
Quote:
Originally Posted by hbquikcomjamesl View Post

Well, they might want to make sure your marble cake doesn't come out the consistency of a block of marble. That was, after all, my own biggest concern, the first time I made my strawberry marble cake. And of course, anything added to the batter can screw up the chemistry, so it doesn't all rise evenly (my strawberry marble doesn't; the strawberry veining is slightly, but visibly, depressed.

 

And for that matter, who says a marble cake has to be chocolate marble? There's strawberry marble, and besides, spice marble, by all accounts, was the very first marble cake.

 

-10 FUN POINTS TO YOU!

 

icon_rolleyes.gif

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