I am donating cupcakes to my town's public schools, which I am super happy to do. However, I was just asked by an acquaintance to donate cupcakes to her child's preschool auction. I don't even like this preschool, my niece was treated badly there, and my daughter went to a different preschool. She thinks it will help me "get my name out there…" I don't need to get my name out there, I am all set for business.
I was thinking of just saying I'm sorry but I am tapped out on the donations this season, it has been quite busy. I guess no matter how I turn her down she is going to be upset with me. It's a small town though. Can anyone think of polite wording to turn her down?
Not sure if this helps. Sounds like you already use it.
My canned answer is "I really appreciate your admiration of my products! However, I have already reached my maximum allowable donations for this fiscal/calendar year/quarter."
If they get pushy, I just lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks Brenda, that's helpful. I will tell her my accountant (husband) has informed me of this.
AI just say im booked. I know thats not as tactful as you would like...so maybe you could throw a sorry infront of it lol :)
I wish I could say I'm booked, but it's an auction, so it would be to make the cupcakes for someone who bids on them and orders them for a later date. I am going to wait a week or so and think about it, right now I think I'm just feeling so tired I don't want to do anything for free. I may offer to do a dozen cupcakes with an easy theme of MY choice.
A[@]Norasmom[/@], I know you from this forum. I have come to think if you as a very kind and generous person.
I get the impression it's difficult for you to say no.
Empower yourself. No. No no no no no.
It has been my personal expierience that the only thing to come from donations is more invitations to donate.
Now, I donate to the events important to me. I do so expecting absolutely nothing in return.
It really is ok to say no. I know you can say it in a gentle way.
I get so many of these (after 14 years in the biz, I no longer have to "get my name out there" Where is "there" anyway/) frankly, I don't even answer them any more. If that's rude, so be it.
A
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[@]Norasmom[/@], I know you from this forum. I have come to think if you as a very kind and generous person.
I get the impression it's difficult for you to say no.
Empower yourself. No. No no no no no.
It has been my personal expierience that the only thing to come from donations is more invitations to donate.
Now, I donate to the events important to me. I do so expecting absolutely nothing in return.
It really is ok to say no. I know you can say it in a gentle way.
I would tell her "I don't feel right donating to that preschool, I had a bad experience with them in the past." She would probably feel more awkward than mad at that, and if she's normal she won't pursue it. If she's nosey she'll ask you about it and you can just say you don't want to gossip about it, but you just don't feel like donating to the school. If she really pushes it tell her you can't do it and give her the hairy eyeball.
Here's why I don't like the preschool. My 3-year old niece went there many years ago, and was, believe it or not, bullied. Another little girl was taking toys from her and saying hurtful things and just plain mean. When she would get dropped off my niece would cry and bang on the window because she wanted to go home. I didn't think it possible at that age, but something wasn't right with that bullying child. When my sister approached the preschool's director about it, her response was "she needs to toughen up." Obviously, my sister pulled her out of that school but there was a bit of damage done. My niece was more shy for a few years than I think she would have ordinarily been. The director is still there. My family has a few choice words to describe her, but we are not into destroying people, otherwise, we could have, as we are very well know in our town.
My niece is now a freshman in high school. She remembers it. She can laugh it off now but if you ask her how it felt at the time she will not be smiling.
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The first is a good example, but I think the second will do as well and has the added benefit of working well without the facial hair.. WARNING! Do not, under any circumstances Google hairy eyeball images. It will, seriously, put you off your kibble for a long, loooooong time.
Yes, the top cat is a good example of the hairy eyeball. It's the look your mother gave you that means she's holding off on going off on you in public, but you're going to get it when you get home. Also known as the "stink eye."
I always knew it as "the look" which my mom and many others gave to indicate behave and listen. However love the cat photo... shall we all practice squinting one eye??
Perhaps just saying you have reached your limit for donations would be the wisest. Sometimes the less said the better especially if you are in a small town... word does get around. As one other CC said practice saying no.
good luck on how you handle it.
Thanks everyone for the great advice! I have figured out what I am going to do, which is make 1 dozen cupcakes with very few decorations, which will be extremely minimal cost to me. It just was not worth rocking the boat of my reputation and personal contacts over a conflict.
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The first is a good example, but I think the second will do as well and has the added benefit of working well without the facial hair.. WARNING! Do not, under any circumstances Google hairy eyeball images. It will, seriously, put you off your kibble for a long, loooooong time.
*trying so hard not to google hairy eyeball* haha! I think I can pass, since I am busy...
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