Maternity Leave Advice!

Business By sleepy20520 Updated 14 Aug 2013 , 1:54pm by BrandisBaked

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sleepy20520 Posted 12 Aug 2013 , 11:32pm
post #1 of 17

This is a little long.... but please help!

So I own a cake business that I do out of my home (downstairs in our remodeled basement).  This is my only job and as such I knew I couldnt just take off indefinitely after I had my baby.  I am due this Thursday Aug 15 and I am a first time mom so I am not too sure exactly how much time I will need off.  Some people say 4 weeks is plenty some say a year - which is not doable for me.  I was thinking 6-8 weeks off.  As alot of you may know, having a job like this I cant just work up until I have the baby especially since most of my work is wedding cakes (which people book way far in advance) - so I didnt want to schedule a cake lets say 2 weeks before im due then go into labor and have to cancel.  With that being said, I took my last wedding cake 3 weeks ago to be safe.  Now my dr had mentioned that she would schedule me to be induced on my due date if i hadnt had the baby by then and now is saying shed rather wait a week or so later (which id rather do too) BUT my dilemma: 

I have a wedding cake booked already for Sept 28 (which means I will start working probably Sept 21ish to get everything ready).  Now the wedding cake is fairly simple but the grooms cake they want is very hard and detailed and a 3D cake.  Normally this is no issue but im scared I wont be healed enough.  Now why did i take the cake order you ask?  Well its actually a friend of mines wedding and she asked me when i was probably 6 months prego and I thought (in my naive, first time mom state) that Id prolly have the baby by now so having 5-6 weeks off would be enough.  Well now if im another week later (past my due date) im going to be down to 4 weeks and im kinda freaking out!  Now even tho this cake is for a friend, she is still paying me to do it, like any other client i have.  

 

Its the only order I have for that week so im debating what to do.  The wedding cake is fairly easy, just a 3 tier buttercream cake and shes providing flowers - i know i can do that because its only about 10 hours of work.  Im mainly worried about taking another 15-20 hours to do the grooms cake they want and what i should do....esp with a newborn at home

My biggest concern is what if im another week late and if something happens and i have a csection--i really dont think 4 weeks is enough time to heal.

Please no mean responses - i know i should have alotted for more time and it was very dumb and naive of me to think id have had the baby by now.... but what should i do now?

Should I wait and try not to be induced and maybe tell her i cant do the grooms cake because i wont be healed enough? 

should i hope i can do it and im healed enough?

is 4 weeks of time off enough?  since im not tech going to a job outside of my home and its not a full 40 hours?  with both cakes its more like 30 hours.  HELP! advice from other moms and bakers!

16 replies
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jennicake Posted 12 Aug 2013 , 11:38pm
post #2 of 17

Congrats on the baby :)

 

I'm not a mom, so I can't really comment on whether or not you will be feeling up to it once the baby is here... but is it possible to do small things here and there for the groom's cake as you get time?  Bake a cake one day and freeze it... make the frosting another day and freeze it... tint the fondant a different day... work on accent pieces when you get 30 minutes here and there.  That way when it is actually time to decorate, a lot of the pre-work will be done.  

 

Or, since they were going to pay you for the cake anyways, can you explain your dilemma to your friend (being your friend, I am sure she would understand!) and find another baker to do the grooms cake?

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as you wish Posted 12 Aug 2013 , 11:45pm
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AFirst and foremost (and this probably goes without saying anyway) don't let a cake deadline affect your decision to induce or not; make that call with your doctor's advice purely on what is best for you and baby. Let the cake issue be a completely separate issue. As far as the cake you have booked goes, I don't think you can really know how things are going to go until you have your baby. If everything goes smoothly with the delivery you probably won't have any trouble getting this cake done. (But I wouldn't take on any more orders just yet. :) ) I was induced at almost two weeks past my delivery date and I had a bad time of it (I am not going to give you the horror story; I'm sure you don't need it!) but I was still able to be up and around enough to do things at home in pretty short time. The best advise I could give you would be to wait and see. Once you are home with you baby for a few days you should have an idea whether you will be able to manage or if you need to alter things with the bride. Just make sure she knows that this is your plan so she can make other arrangements now if she want to.

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howsweet Posted 12 Aug 2013 , 11:48pm
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This is just my opinion, but I think unless you really, really need that money, you will be so relieved if you find someone else to take both orders. You don't want to have to worry about whether or not you have this baby in time to work things out for a cake order if it's not necessary.

 

And there's no reason to give you a a hard time about anything because no one knows what it's like to have a child until they have one. And that's why I say give both cakes away if you can afford to.

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sixinarow Posted 12 Aug 2013 , 11:52pm
post #5 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by howsweet 

This is just my opinion, but I think unless you really, really need that money, you will be so relieved if you find someone else to take both orders. You don't want to have to worry about whether or not you have this baby in time to work things out for a cake order if it's not necessary.

 

And there's no reason to give you a a hard time about anything because no one knows what it's like to have a child until they have one. And that's why I say give both cakes away if you can afford to.

^^^^

Unless you really, really have to take the order..your friend will understand and you'll be relieved to not have it looming over you. But I would decide either way now, so your friend isn't down to the wire trying to find another baker. Enjoy your time with your newborn -- congratulations!!

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bubs1stbirthday Posted 13 Aug 2013 , 12:03am
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Congratulations and good luck. I had a caesarean 5 months or so ago and by the 4 week mark I was ok except for pain getting up/down from/into a laying position. Some people had a lot of pain for longer but with some Panadol it is certainly manageable. if the cakes are heavy you will not be able to lift them as you risk tearing your stitches (it is major surgery). I would be more concerned about the lack of sleep and also trying to fit the time in around feeding your bub (breastfeeding a new born is very time consuming). The more you can spread it out the easier it will be for you.

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PinkLotus Posted 13 Aug 2013 , 12:07am
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AAs a mom of two, I agree that the best thing would probably be to have someone else do the cakes. It's very possible you will feel fine 4 weeks after giving birth, but it's just as possible that you won't. After my first, I was great after 4 weeks...my second not so much. Plus there are other factors to consider that may make doing these cakes difficult. Newborns rarely cooperate! Lol. IMO, it's just best to not even have to worry about it. And as mentioned, definitely don't let this cake influence whether you are induced or not. Both of my babies were induced and I had uncomplicated births, but induction does increase the chances of a c section. Don't feel bad, most of us don't believe we will be overdue! Congrats :)

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sleepy20520 Posted 13 Aug 2013 , 12:10am
post #8 of 17

I think for now im going to wait until my appt this week with my dr (on wed) and if i have the baby by sat this week i will have a full 5 weeks off.  if something happens and i have a csection i think at that point i will let my friend know that it wasnt in my plans and im sorry but i wont be able to do it.

if i have a natural birth and everything goes ok i might keep the cake and do waht you all said and do a little here and there.  man if i was not feeling so tired now i should probably be baking the cakes now and freezing them - wouldnt that be smart lol.

i know i wont be able to lift the cakes but that is no issue- my husband always helps me lift cakes so im not too worried about that.  i really wish i woulda thought thru the timing before i agreed to it.  the crappy thing is we really do need the money...which is the MAIN reason i dont want to cancel it.  we rely on both of our incomes and with me not working a total of 9 weeks (if you include the before baby and after baby time) its really getting tight with money.  we are already to the point where we cant eat out or anything because its just not doable while im not working.

if it wasnt for the money issue, id prolly just so f it and cancel now.

so i guess at this point its just waiting some more.... im just such a planner type a person and not knowing is driving me nuts!

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BatterUpCake Posted 13 Aug 2013 , 12:11am
post #9 of 17

You should be fine. Within 2 weeks I was out and about. My daughter went back 2 work 2 weeks after a cesarean (I don't know how!) But 4 weeks should be plenty of time for a traditional delivery. Like suggested start now. Making and freezing whatever you can. If there are any gumpaste items make sure you store them out of direct light..good luck and congratulations!

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Smckinney07 Posted 13 Aug 2013 , 12:20am
post #10 of 17

AI was induced almost a week after my due date. I worked up until about a week before, just because I was tired of being on my feet (but I was in sales then so it was different). I was fine as soon as I came home from the hospital, doing regular things about 10-12 days after giving birth.

You never know and yes I would take it easy (order wise) for a while until you get a routine in order. Do you have someone who could step in and help you? That might be the best option if you want to take the order, if you know any local decorators that might be willing to help you if you need it.

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sleepy20520 Posted 13 Aug 2013 , 12:44am
post #11 of 17

I normally (before baby) would take around 3-4 weddings a week and that was definitely a full week for me.  Now I was planning on only taking one a week when i go back to work for awhile just to get a routine in order.... then i figure i can always take other orders as fill ins if i think im up to it.

i would love to take none but like i mentioned, money is an issue and we just cant do without any income at this point.  who wouldnt love to just quit working! :)

ive decided im going to not be induced until my dr says i have to (whether thats at 1 week past due date or 2) and if it gets to that point i will just let my friend know the situation.  and im sorry but it is what it is.... i cant let a cake (for anyone) come before my health or my babies.

i would love to avoid being induced but i know at some point we have no control :)

thansk everyone!

im glad i know now and if i ever have any more kids i wont be so dumb in my planning!!!

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therealmrsriley Posted 13 Aug 2013 , 1:11am
post #12 of 17

AIt would be good to give your friend the heads up about your concerns now so she can already be thinking of a plan b. I will say if you have a c-section and uiy still decide to do the cake someone else will need to roll fondant as that requires stomach muscles. Different people recover differently. It's one of those things you won't know until you've delivered the baby.

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bubs1stbirthday Posted 13 Aug 2013 , 1:29am
post #13 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by therealmrsriley 

It would be good to give your friend the heads up about your concerns now so she can already be thinking of a plan b. I will say if you have a c-section and uiy still decide to do the cake someone else will need to roll fondant as that requires stomach muscles. Different people recover differently. It's one of those things you won't know until you've delivered the baby.

Agreed - your friend needs to be given the opportunity to try and find someone else if she wants to. I would assume that seeing she is a friend she would know when you are due and may already have some concerns that you might not be able to do the cake. It is only fair that she be given as much notice as possible as it is not only your needs that should be taken into consideration. Good Luck and I hope it works out for you. Also on a little side note - unless your baby is in distress I would not let them induce you on your due date - due dates are only an approximation and most people do not go into labour or give birth on their due date - up to two weeks over is normal (but I do stress AS LONG AS BUBS IS OK)

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BatterUpCake Posted 13 Aug 2013 , 1:48am
post #14 of 17

Doctors are so quick to induce these days. I have been told by a few people who work in the hospital or OB/GYN offices that they do it so the won't get weekend/late night calls...they never did this back when I was having babies unless it was absolutely necessary. The baby knows when it is ready to come out the majority of the time. Sorry for my rant...just a pet peeve

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kikiandkyle Posted 13 Aug 2013 , 2:22am
post #15 of 17

AEvery birth is different, every body is different. You can't know what will happen until the baby comes, but it probably would be wise to have some kind of backup plan just in case. And definitely don't let them induce you just because its your due date. Wait as long as they will let you.

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mcaulir Posted 13 Aug 2013 , 3:18am
post #16 of 17
Quote:
Originally Posted by kikiandkyle 

Every birth is different, every body is different. You can't know what will happen until the baby comes, but it probably would be wise to have some kind of backup plan just in case. And definitely don't let them induce you just because its your due date. Wait as long as they will let you.

^This.

 

I was 11 days over with both of mine. It wasn't whether my body was healed with the first one, but there were some issues with feeding, and sleep, and I was a complete zombie person for about three months after my first. Perfect pregnancy, I was in perfect health. I had no reason to think there would be any particular issues. You just don't know how things will go.

 

Do you have any family or friends nearby OP? Could you 'book' a mother or mother-in-law, or friend for the day or couple of days before the wedding to help with the baby while you do cake? You might be able to express so someone else can do some feeds, or they can rock the baby and change nappies etc. If you let someone know early, they might be able to help you out.

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BrandisBaked Posted 14 Aug 2013 , 1:54pm
post #17 of 17

AYou might be fine immediately afterward. I only missed one day of work when one of mine was born. The only deliveries where I actually felt bad were the ones that I had an episiotomy, which they don't do as much nowadays. Otherwise, I was absolutely fine the day after (just tired).

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