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Should I say anything?

post #1 of 22
Thread Starter 
I don't know what to do - - or if I should just stay out of it. There's a new cake shop that just opened near where I work. In the course of my work, I have had the opportunity to deal with the baker's husband - as have several other people I've spoken with.

Here's the deal - - and I'm being as nice as I possibly can - - the guy is a big fat jerk. His reputation is spreading very fast and his poor wife who just opened her business isn't going to have a chance to get it off the ground before he ruins it for her. He's arrogant and extremely rude, and treats everyone as though they work for him. I've heard several people say they wouldn't go to her shop because they might run into him.

I've tried to see if she's on CC so I could pm her, but if she is, I can't find her. I feel really bad for her and I don't want her business to fail before anyone even gets to try her cakes. On the other hand, she may be well aware she's married to Jeffrey the Jackass and wouldn't appreciate hearing anything.

So what do I do?
post #2 of 22
Personally I would stay out of it. Like you said she knows who she is married too. If you say something they may think you're just trying to protect your business and start bad mouthing you. Leave it alone until it affects you.
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post #3 of 22
Don't do anything. How would you like someone to email you anonymously and tell you that your husband is a jerk. What is she supposed to do divorce him to make you happy. Stay out of it.
post #4 of 22
Or...if you know she's going to be in the shop, call and give an anonymous complaint about the treatment you have received from the husband. She might know how her husband is at home, but she might not know that he treats the customers the way he does. Being this is her (their) company, she might think he will do everything in his power to make the company succeed, and not to ambush it. I would give her the heads up by placing a call. Whether she wants to do anything with that information will then be in her hands....
post #5 of 22
whiley your intentions are noble, there really is no good to come of it. LIke it was said, she knows who she is married to and at this point what is she going to do? And this is her plot to plow, marital rocks and all.
post #6 of 22
I would just stay out of it. IMHO, at the end of the day, no matter how nice or unpleasant a sales person is, the product is what drives customers.
For example, there is a guy in my area that sells a product, and is as rude as all get out. He is doing YOU a favor by being in the area and having a product to sell, and he lets you know it. Lines out the door every holiday season.
People overlook the attitude because his product is so good. Now, on the other hand, you will have some people that won't come back because of the attitude, but a really nice person with a really bad product will loose customers faster than a nasty one with a great product.
post #7 of 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by debidehm

Or...if you know she's going to be in the shop, call and give an anonymous complaint about the treatment you have received from the husband.


This. The fact that this guy is the owner's husband is irrelevant (at least from your perspective), treat it as you would any situation where an employee was rude to a customer.
post #8 of 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by jason_kraft

Quote:
Originally Posted by debidehm

Or...if you know she's going to be in the shop, call and give an anonymous complaint about the treatment you have received from the husband.


This. The fact that this guy is the owner's husband is irrelevant (at least from your perspective), treat it as you would any situation where an employee was rude to a customer.



I tend to agree..Just because he is the husband doesn't mean he has free reign over how he treats the customers. If it were, say a flower shop or a clothing store, etc and you received rude service from an employee, would you not make a complaint?
Somebody else mentioned that it's the product that sells the business, but I don't think that is necessarily true. I think it depends on how the customer chooses to deal with it. For instance, we have a great mexican restraunt down the street that my husband loves. Twice we went in there and had AWFUL service, both times we asked to speak to a manager and both times we were told there was no manager on duty (yeah,sure there isn't). Even though they have great food, we will no longer go in there for the simple fact of how we are treated. Whenever the name of that place comes up in conversation my husband mentions how horrible we have been treated on more than one occasion.
I think if it were me, I would probably call her also. She doesn't have to know that you are aware that he is the husband. For all you know, he is just another employee. I am not known to be one for allowing myself to be treated poorly by anybody, especially by somebody that is in a customer service position...
Just my opinion though! icon_smile.gif

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post #9 of 22
I agree with Jason and docofthedead. She can't deal with it is shes not told about it. Word does spread fast and she deserves the opportunity to put a stop to it.
post #10 of 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by SoFloGuy

Don't do anything. How would you like someone to email you anonymously and tell you that your husband is a jerk. What is she supposed to do divorce him to make you happy. Stay out of it.



I doubt the OP is thinking about her own happiness icon_rolleyes.gif

If I were the wife of this obnoxious fool - I think I'd want to know. Sometime how they may not show this side to the spouse.
post #11 of 22
I'd say something too...If my husband was being a jerk and people were actually saying that they would avoid going in because of him she needs to know.
post #12 of 22
Quote:
Originally Posted by jason_kraft

Quote:
Originally Posted by debidehm

Or...if you know she's going to be in the shop, call and give an anonymous complaint about the treatment you have received from the husband.


This. The fact that this guy is the owner's husband is irrelevant (at least from your perspective), treat it as you would any situation where an employee was rude to a customer.



Sorry but the situation is not the same at all. The OP states that she has encountered the husband in the course of her work not encounters in the shop. Treating him as if he were an employee is useless as she will not see him that way. And those complaining will not be viewed of or thought of as customers---just some unidentified person calling to complain about her husband.

What he is doing outside of her business he is acting as her spouse not an employee. Thus it is most certainly relevant that he is her spouse. It is unfortunate that he is creating this situation. But approaching her as if he is just another employee is pointless. In addition, if she is not going to be receptive to comments as others have noted, do you honestly believe she is going to take seriously an anonymous call about her husband?
post #13 of 22
Based on the OP it was my impression that the husband was helping out at the shop, if he is not working at the shop then obviously filing a complaint about him doesn't make much sense.
post #14 of 22
As a business owner, there is always drama. Best to keep it to yourself.
post #15 of 22
Unless the husband was working in the capacity of an employee and in the process was rude to the OP, I say stay out of it. I doubt she's going to divorce him to improve sales.
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