I have 5 children (and 1 grandchild), so it pretty much goes without saying that I LOVE kids. But there is a time and a place for them. Some people don't get it. I have a friend who has a 3 year old, and last year, she couldn't get a sitter and brought him (then 2) to my x-mas party! All adults and lot of booze!!! I got rid of my OWN kids (sent them to stay with friends) because I thought it wasn't appropriate for them to be there. Did she call and ask me if it would be alright? Nope. She just showed up with him in tow expecting me to "understand". What could I say at that point? But boy was I P*SSED! Some people might understand outwardly, but still be stewing inside (as I was).

This same friend will bring her little dog to my house too (she knows I have allergies). Some people just don't think.

It never ceases to amaze me that people will do something that SHOULD cause them embarrassment, and then when the other party doesn't go out of their way to "soothe" that embarrassment, the offending party gets put out

Had this been me, I would have EXPECTED a pretty harsh response from the instructor!

Sorry, but the OP knew that arriving late and with a small child in tow was not OK--at the very least, on the point of the lateness. She put the instructor on the spot. The instructor told her--and the rest of the class at the same time--what the policy was regarding children. I see no reason why the instructor should have used even more valuable time in order to take an ADULT out into the hallway to explain the obvious.

The more mature thing here may have been for the OP to poke her head in the door and say, "Just wanted to let you know that in addition to being very late, I have no sitter, so I'll withdraw for this session and I'll see you on the next go 'round." Good feelings and no burned bridges that way.

I see a lot of "misery wanting miserable company" these days, and that's all that can be accomplished by complaining to the store or Wilton about the instructor's handling of the situation. She'll be made to feel bad about following the rules, and that's just a waste. She did her job. She just didn't coat it in cotton candy----and I don't think she should have, anyway.

Just my honest .02
Rae

krysoko wrote:
"One lady brought her very bad kid to a final testing. They had to be put in another room
b/c she was so disruptive. The lady was very embarassed. But some day ya just gotta do
what ya gotta do. She put on her big girl panties and dealt w/the consequences that came
along. It was bring the bad kid along or flunk the final."

Wow. If someone brought a screaming kid to my final, I'd be so P*SS'ed. The ONLY appropriate thing to do would have been to contact the instructor and ask to reschedule the final. I had to reschedule tests several times during college because of illness or conflicts, and I never had an instructor refuse to do that. In my opinion, risking everyone else's grades by disrupting their final is not "putting on her big girl panties." It's thinking she was the only person in the room who mattered.

I have to say that I have taken MANY Wilton courses.....all with my child in tow and paying for her to be there! She did better than many adults in the class with us! Nowhere have I ever seen that Wilton has a no child policy! I can say that Michaels didn't mind collecting money for my daughter to take classes! My instructor also let my son (younger) come to a class with me and visit to see what was going on. He was well behaved and the entire class enjoyed having him visit! (I did OK it with all of them first).
As far as being embarrassed at the teacher calling you out in front of the class, that is not right. We all run late sometimes! Whether it be traffic, children, work etc. My instructor nor my classmates ever freaked out on each other! It's called patience and understanding. Now if it was repetitive that would be a different story!
Good luck taking your class in the future!

This reply is not intended for the OP, it is for some of the other people that responded here about taking their kids to places that they had no business taking them...

I don't care if your child is well behaved. If I sign up for a class - college, Wilton or otherwise - I don't want to show up and see kids there. The ONLY exception is if the child is of the age/ability to be also paying for and taking the class alongside me. That is a different case entirely.

Just because your child is so precious and adorable to you doesn't mean that others feel the same way. Saying that "other people didn't mind them being there" is no excuse. It is more likely that people would feel badly to TELLING you that they were bothered/annoyed/distracted by your child being there. The bottom line is that taking kids to classes IS an imposition on the instructor and the other students.

It's unfortunate that not only you, but the Wilton instructor and possibly some of your classmates were placed in an awkward position because of your daughter's presence.

Seen from another perspective...

If the WMI did allow your child to stay, other students might complain because they didn't bring or knew they couldn't bring their kids for free.

Or conversely, if the WMI did let your daughter stay - students who signed up for an adult class might have complained and/or requested refunds.

Wilton instructors sometimes offer classes geared for children, but then each child is a paying student.

Expecting the WMI to NOT follow the rules of her employer in order to accommodate you is unreasonable. Do you really expect her to put her job on the line for you?

All in all, the considerate or deliberate course of action would have been to ask the WMI anytime from prior to registering for the class up until the time you left for the class whether or not very young children or unpaid child students could attend (with a paying adult).

I understand your frustration, but you weren't the only aggrieved party in this scenario.

As to taking you aside to explain...

Your late arrival caused one disturbance to the class, expecting the instructor to absent herself to explain during paid class time is a disservice to the students who were there on time (or earlier in order to set up their work stations).

And if she had taken you aside, don't you think there would have been complaints that the class was disrupted and/or the class was shortened.

Sorry, but you put the instructor between a rock and a hard place. (That's what happens when you ass-u-me.)

This was a faux pas... but none of us are perfect. We all live and learn.

I have to stand up here...I'm sure this will make some of you guys angry, but I think this needs to be toned down. The OP was simply upset and stressed-embarrassed about her situation. I think she just felt slapped across the face and even if it was because of something she did wrong, it doesn't need to continue here.
Some of you guys are being a little harsh (saying isn't is OBVIOUS?) Fine-but give her a break! It wasn't obvious to her. She just wanted support from her friends here, which we can still do by letting her know she made a mistake - nicely.
I've been subjected to the angry side of CC before when very upset, and it's tough! It's funny that an internet forum can make you feel worse, but it can. Let's just give it a rest now, pat her on the back and tell her to keep her chin up.
JMHO.
Let the flaming begin.

Personally, I don't think anyone was being rude. Those of us who think that the OP was in the wrong for assuming it was OK to bring a child to a class were just voicing that.

The fact that the OP had even CONSIDERED complaining about the instructor was what upset me the most. People need to be accountable for their own bad behavior and as there was no name-calling or insults I don't see why we all need to support what we feel is wrong. Just because I think she was wrong in this instance doesn't mean I think she's a bad person - I just think she needs to consider these things the next time she is presented with a similar situation. And frankly, I wish people would realize that just because THEIR world revolves around their children (or their dogs - or both), doesn't mean the rest of us even want those children (or animals) in our own personal orbits. Children simply don't belong in classes, unless it is approved in advance by the instructor.

I absolutely adore my friend's child, but I don't want him coming to an evening x-mas cocktail party - it's just not appropriate. I have since made it clear to this friend that I love her son, but dinner/cocktail party invitations are for her and her husband only, and I will understand if she can't come if she can't find a sitter. And I can tell when I say this how she thinks that *I* am the one who is rude. Some people just need to learn. At my last dinner party a couple of weeks ago though, they arrived sans toddler!

[/quote]

You wouldn't take your daughter with you to your ob-gyn exam, would you?[/quote]

I think that's a completely different scenario altogether. Although I've never done that and will hopefully not. You wouldn't imagine how many ppl actually do this. I guess when you don't a babysitter, then you just don't have a choice. It's that simple.


And also I do agree w/toning things down a bit. In general, you never know what the other person's going through or what her battles are. Compassion for others and their situations is something I strive to have. It's not always easy believe me. I'm sure everyone here on CC has had a bad moment or two even if it was yourself at fault. I, personally, TRY to give others the benefit of doubt. We've all been stuck in a difficult situation. When I meet the Lord, I'll want Him to know I treated His ppl w/compassion as Christ did.

I was a Wilton Instructor for two months and I would have had no problem if a person had to bring their child with them. Its their money and their kid. I never heard of a "no kid" rule.

I would have never turned a student away from a paid class. OP, sorry you had to go through that.

If nothing else, the instructor should have understood that the OP went through the hassle of coming, paid the fee...and let the child stay this one time, warning the OP that next time-- the child should stay home. The instructor should NOT have sent a paid student home if she didn't know she couldn't bring a child.

"You wouldn't imagine how many ppl actually do this."
Just because lots of people do this does NOT make it right or appropriate. Expecting the world to accomodate you and your child, damned be the consequences or inconveniences to someone else, is selfish and rude.

"Although I've never done that and will hopefully not." Your gut feeling/common sense is telling you that a preschooler in the ob-gyn exam room is inappropriate. I mean, at the very least, think of it from the child's point of view - it will be scary for her.

"I think that's a completely different scenario altogether." I disagree, it's not a completely different scenario. Different setting, perhaps, but same principal.

"I guess when you don't a babysitter, then you just don't have a choice." Yes, you DO have a choice. Find another sitter. Have DH/SO rearrange work schedules. Trade off childcare with a friend or neighbor. Use a drop-in hourly childcare center. Re-arrange your own schedule and go to the ob-gyn (perhaps next week instead) or to the cake class (perhaps next year, when DD is in preschool) at another time.

"It's that simple."
Motherhood is not simple. It's hard, constant work. It takes sacrifices, and sometimes you just can't do what you want, or even need, to do at a partricular moment.

Policy is acceptable.
Unprofessionalism is not acceptable.
Call Wilton immediately and inform them on how they are being represented.
It's always best to call first when it comes to bringing kids along.

In one of my classes, I had a really nice student with a grade school aged son. One time her parents weren't able to keep him (or had to get him late...I think they came to get him halfway through the class) so she asked if he could sit in on the class. I said yes, and he sat there perfectly quiet the entire time.

I can't help but think about what a JERK I would have been, had I sent this student home just because her babysitting ended up late for ONE time.

Things happen. The more mercy we have on others, the more we can hope to have on ourselves when we make mistakes. Which we will.

I'm not the most merciful person myself, I have to work on it...but man, some of you act like you've never made a mistake in your life.

Sorry she was rude to you, but she may have felt her hand was forced. If the class already began, how could she discreatly let you know that your daughter was not welcome.
My kids range from 14 to 33, grandkids, are 12, 10, and 8. Hey when I plan a NO KID day, I can and probably am a B#$%^ about MY time. Sorry, IMHO.

Hi ,I haven't read all the post .But here are my .2 cents.I am a new WMI and Iam not aware of no kid policy.I even asked my store manager about the age limit for students and he told me if a mother wants to join the kids then ist ok with him and if I donot mind teaching kids then that's my decition.
My understanding is that its a FUN class.If it was my class I would hve asked other students if they have any objection and done according to their wishes .
When I took my classes ,I remember people droping in all the time .My Instructor was at that store for years and every one who visited store came in to say hi ,but she was a very good teacher and we all learned a lot and had fun doing it .

I can see every angle of this situation and I feel compassion for what you went through. I'm sorry you were embarrassed. I would've been embarrassed, too. Here are my two perspectives.

As a student in the class, I would not want children in the room unless they were so well-behaved that I forgot they were there. I'm very possessive of my learning time and my "ME" time, especially when I'm paying for it. As an aside, there was a lady in my last class that kept her phone on and it would ring, she'd look at it, decide she didn't need to talk to that person, and just let it ring on into eternity. I wanted to say, "Ya know, there's a way to at least make that thing shut up if you aren't going to answer it." (And, no, before someone says it, she wasn't expecting a life-altering phonecall. This was the norm.) That phone aggravated me to no end. It had one of those really loud, obnoxious rings. Everyone in class would just kind of look at each other without saying a word, but the looks said it all. We were all thinking the same thing.... like Jeff Dunham's Achmed.. "I kill you!"

As a Mom, I would not have brought the child unless I had spoken to the teacher beforehand. If it meant I missed the class, then so be it. I missed many things when my son was young.

I do hope you can get your babysitting straightened out and can take the class again. Don't let this dissuade you from doing that. Sometimes sh*t happens. Just learn from it and move forward!

Lisa

I feel for you and this embarassment. However, though I do not wish to be unkind or insensitive to anyone, my opinion is that kids do not belong in a classroom. At best, they distract the mother. At worst, the distract everyone.

I especially don't believe this wmi deserves to be reported. She was placed in a very difficult position. Just my 2 cents.

I was a WMI for over 3 years and the Michael's store that I worked in had a policy that children could attend - as long as they were 'paying' customers just like everyone else. I think the OP made several agregious errors:

First, I think it is very rude and disruptive to walk into a class 15 minutes late. That to me says that you value your time more than mine or anyone else's in the class. I used to make an announcement on the very first day that if you were late, I would not make any attempts to go over the items missed due to your lateness. Everyone pays a lot of money between the class fee and supplies and it's not fair when the instructor has to stop and go over things that you missed because you couldn't be there on time. You know what time the class starts every week - it's not like it's a surprise.

Second, I think it's very presumptuous that you think it's ok for you to just show up with your young child in hand AFTER being 15 minutes late. Did you ever think about calling beforehand saying I don't have a babysitter, is it ok to bring him/her with me to class? You never know, maybe the instructor might have agreed to let you make up the class - there were a few times when I made arrangements with students to come in and make up the day on my own time.

Don't get me wrong, I love kids to death, but I get very upset when people assume that since their child is the most important thing to them (understandably) that everyone else will think the same

Oh my, some of these comments are soooo harsh. For goodness sakes, it was a Wilton class, NOT a college course, and it was a 4 year old child not a one year who needs constant attention. My four year old can totally occupy himself and behave quietly when I bring him places. I leave my kids home alot when I go places, but sometimes I have to bring them. Yes being a mother of 3 little ones you do have to sacrifice alot of what you want to do, but really...not everything.

And yes, I've even brought my kids to the ob/gyn. High risk third pregnancy...had appts 2-3 times a week. They were mostly sonogram checks and stress checks, but my two little ones were there in the room when I didn't have a sitter (with the doctor who delivered them BTW). My doctor jokes around with them, such a nice man.

I grew up in a big family and kids went to everything, dinner parties, weddings, showers, everything...At my wedding, I made it clear that children were WELCOME. We served them pizza, I even hired a strolling magician to entertain the adults during the cocktail hour and do a show for the kids while the adults had their dinner.

Really, it's not a federal offense......How hard would it have been for the instructor to give the kid a piece of fondant, a rolling pin and a smile.

Would it have been hard - probably not. BUT, what if this person's 4 year old wasn't as well behaved?? What if he/she could not sit there quietly and be content to play with some fondant?? Is it fair to the instructor and EVERYONE else in the class that has paid good money to learn????

In the 4th Wilton class I had a similiar situation happen. A woman brought her two kids to class 3/4 classes while I kept my kids at home with either my husband or a sitter if he was working. They weren't the best behaved and they always wanted to "sample" frosting.
It was annoying to me because I've cancelled things I wanted to do when a sitter fell through. I don't know that complaining about the instructor is something I would do. She may have been having a bad day just as the OP was and class had already begun. She got her money back so it wasn't a total loss even though she wanted to take the class. I had to drop out of the first class I ever took and did not get my money back, store policy if you took one class-no refunds.
I taught at the University of Hawaii when we lived there and I had to tell the students they could not bring in kids even though most of the people were parents anyway as it was U H's policy and it was clearly stated in the syllabus "as per University policy . . .".
I know that no matter how well behaved the kids may generally be, they all have off days like we do. Perhaps the instructor could have used a different "tone" but in the end there will be another opportunity to take the class, I had to wait 5 years but I was able to get started.
So, flame away.

Well if the child is not well behaved then you remove the child from the situation, it's not rocket science. How hard it for the instructor to politely say. "Generally, we don't allow children, but if little Susie is happy playing with a bit of fondant well give it a try for today."

Oh boy.