Is The "what's The No So Smartest Thing You've Done In
Decorating By Kahuna Updated 8 Aug 2008 , 1:40pm by 7yyrt
OK... Here's mine. I had a pyrex glass(first mistake) baking dish in the bottom of my oven with some water in it for steam while I was baking a large cake. Well, I let the oven preheat for way too long before actually getting around to baking(second mistake). Towards the end of the cake baking, I peeked in and realized that it was starting to evaporate, not wanting it to do so completely I, without thinking, added more water. Hot-as-the-tap-would-get-water, but clearly not-hot-enough-water(mistake of the century).... yeah, the glass baking dish--exploded. Millions of tiny little glass pieces and water everywhere. Totally put out the oven. I had to wait for it to cool, then totally dismantle it(the oven), to clean glass out of everything, then start baking all over again. It sucked sooo bad. On the bright side, my oven got really clean, and I ONLY cut myself 3 times in the process.
I did that too this past year, except I not only had I lost my pryrex dish.. I ruined a perfectly good pork roast 
A piece of hot glass melted to my floor too, lol.
Doesn't it suck!?! I hate when that happens. Maybe we should just go have a nut snack!
I think there are some nut sack cakes on another board.
OOOH! Perfect for a nut snack!
Ok - so I'm over my exhaustion enduced giggles from last night and am ready to share a story....
I was making some caramel ganache for a cake tasting for a friend of mine. I melted the caramel and added the heavy whip put it in the fridge to chill. I took it out to whip it up into the filling - put the beater in the bowl, turned it on and somehow lost my grip on the bowl. The bowl went flinging around and around and around and caramel ganache FLEW all over my kitchen. So my knee jerk reaction was to turn the mixer off - but...I turned it up higher and more caramel flew even further - I finally got hold of the bowl and turned the mixer off, when I looked in the bowl there was no caramel ganache left! Most landed in my hair!
I have also decided that new favorite word/phrase is "nut snack". changed from "suck fest".
Wow Janel, That probably took forever to clean up! 
Oh, and suck fest.... also a great phrase! You can always combine the two for even more fun. 
when I was in university I made a yummy smoothie filled my glass and and some left over. I filled a plastic glass with it and was taking it to a friend down the hall. Somehow I tripped trying to get through the door. the cup bounced against the door spilling purple smoothie everywhere, door, rug, freshly showered me. Two days later I found some on the ceiling behind the door - I have no idea HOW it managed to spray there.
Ha Ha! LOL varika! Too funny! I have to leave to go camping with my hubby now. Don't have too much fun without me!
I just thought of a dumb one on myself. Several months ago I was going to make a small batch of choc bc. Since it was just a small batch, I decided I'd just use my hand mixer. I was putting the beaters in the mixer, using my stomach to hold the back of the mixer. As soon as the handle of the mixer touched me, it turned on and my hand went up between the two beaters. OUCH! I turned it off, but my hand was still stuck until I ejected the beaters. That one left a mark. Is THAT why they call it a hand mixer??
After that, I just wanted to get a nut snack, but had to settle for a nut sack. Oh, Lordy, what am I saying????
i had a random craving for bacon a few weeks ago...i never fry anything, i hate grease, but i do love bacon (who doesn't?). but i'd never made it before. 
seriously. so i'm frying up the bacon and i have some vague memory of my mother putting bacon grease in a coffee can so i'm thinking i must need to pour it into something and let it congeal, and i'm looking around (no coffee cans) and there's a used water glass on the counter and it's got a little water in the bottom but i'm like, who cares if it's clean, i'm dumping bacon grease into it. so i pour it in and the glass EXPLODES and hot bacon grease with shards of glass in it is running in every direction. oops.
also last thanksgiving my dad made turkey soup and i brought some home, and i was heating it up one night and i added steamed carrots, celery, some rice, a bunch of fresh herbs, it was smelling soooooo delicious. then i decided at the last minute that i wanted to thicken it up a little so i grabbed the cornstarch and stirred it into some milk, dumped it in....yeah. it wasn't cornstarch, it was baking powder. my beautiful once-a-year turkey soup turned into turkey foam.
I made color flow pieces for my wine bottle retirement cake. This was the first time I'd used color flow and was sooo proud at how nice the pieces looked. I made them 3 days ahead of time so that they would dry completely and was storing them in the oven to keep them safe. Well, I went to bake the cake and turned on the oven.... That stuff really puffs up when it gets hot!! Ended up having to make chocolate transfers because I didn't have time to do the color flow again.
I was cooking dried beans for the first time. I didn't know they sucked up all the water and swelled. Well, I was using the pressure cooker. All the water cooked out of it. The lid blew off(good thing no one was in the kitchen). Embedded beans into the ceiling.
I bought a four pack of the bake even strips....Was really excited to use them, tore them open, got down to business....I used them for like, 4 weeks, I swear, and every time I used them it felt like they were bigger or smaller than the last time.....till one day I realized they were different sizes..I'd been making the small ones fit on my bigger pans by doubling them up sometimes, (And magically other times they would fit!) or by having way too much left over....In my joy to get started baking with them, I had never read that they were different sizes! 
This is not a food story....
Thanksgiving night after spending about 7 hours in the car driving to and from Houston to do the stressful family thing I wake up at 3:30 a.m. having a sneezing/allergy attack. So I get up and take a whole Zyrtec (a no-no for me since they make me loopy). Drop off into a drugged sleep and don't wake up until late. I roll over look at the alarm clock and shriek. It's after 10 a.m. and I'm late for my hair appointment. I never miss my hair appointments - my operator is too busy and no way can I wait another week or two or three.
Jump up, throw on my clothes, slap on some makeup, run to the phone and call. The phone rings, rings, rings (WHY AREN"T THEY ANSWERING??), finally get dropped into voice mail. I leave a panicked message ("I'm on my way!"), then grab my keys, jump in the car and screech out of the driveway, still mostly asleep mind you. I'm halfway out of my subdivision before I realize... it's Friday and my hair appointment isn't until Saturday.
OH I just remembered another one (ther are soo many) anyway, this past holiday season I was super busy (for me) tons of football cakes, cake ball orders, Christmas cakes etc. So my Mom comes up, takes DD to the park, DH is at work oh I'm going to get soo much done. I'm using the large icing tip (you know the one with all the little teeth) lay on the crusting B/C on a Christmas cake. Start racing around while I'm waiting the 15 minutes for the icing to crust, go to clean the icing tip and my fingers go all the way through!! Now I have those little teeth stuck in my fingers, can't squeeze the tip hard enough to get them out, freaking out because cell phones don't work at the park ( can't call MOM) DH is at least 45 minutes away. All I could think was I'm going to have to drive to the fire station with this dang icing tip stuck on my hand and I still have sooo much work I have to do!! Finally I was able to get enough pressure to back the teeth out of my fingers and get my hand out. HMMMM, these disasters always seem to happen when I'm cleaning ????
Okay...so today I was having a lovely picnic with my daughter, my sister and my nephews...Doesn't a squirrel decide to get curious and start peeing at a tree near by... Does this little story tie into the whole 'nut' humour?!?!?!? Maybe not..had to share... 
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=0bUxi_Eo6fU
Check this one out!
Friday night back in the early 90's, my first house, single girls, some cute guys are coming over for a few drinks and cards. Decided that Strawberry dacquiri's were calling my name. Took out the blender and went to plug it in and had to bend over to find the plug and when I plugged it in, it sucked in all my hair into the bottom of the blender. (The pitcher was not attached) and I had a blender on the side of my head for about 30 minutes with everybody trying to unravel my long hair out of it. Long story short, that was when I decided I needed a bob haircut. I lost half of my hair that night but the drinks were good and to this day I still have that blender and there is still hair wrapped on the bottom... It is my visual reminder everytime I plug that thing in.
I am the world biggest klutz with the worlds worst luck. In my family I am know as the appliance killer.
One morning I was at my mom and dads for breakfast. I was in the kitchen helping my mom cook, and the biscuits were cooked, but they werent brown. SO my mom turned up the over to like 500 so they would get brown. A few minutes later she asked me to check on them, so I grabbed a dishtowel (no pot holders) and proceeded to remove the biscuits from the oven, unaware that the dish towel had touched the hot coil and had caught on fire.
As soon as I felt the burning towel on my arm I dropped it onto the floor right in front of the refridgerator which sucked it right up underneath. The dust immediately caught fire, with a loud WHOOSH! I screamed for help, and we finally got the fire out, but the fridge was toast along with the wall behind it.
Since then, I have also set a dryer, a dishwasher, a toaster, and my washing machine full of water mind you, on fire. If I wasnt such a good cook, my mom wouldnt let me in her kitchen anymore.
i'm sitting here giggling like an 8th grade boy!!!
i have 2 little stories - my folks used to keep all of their bread and chips in the oven (who knows why) when i lived at home i burned all that crap a million times. what a stink! burnt plastic!
also, we drove to ohio last week (12 hour drive GULP!) to visit my husband's 92 year old grandma. so we had grilled some hot dogs and hamburgers one of the first nights there and when a friend of the family shows up grandma says to this guy "can i fix you a weiner sandwich?". i've been working "weiner sandwich" into every conversation possible now. my husband's b-day is tomorrow. i'm thinking of making him a weiner sandwich cake!
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