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How to handle rude family members! Please help - Page 2

post #16 of 89
5/30/08 at 9:54am
Some family members don't like to take advantage of others and/or he was afraid of the $$. I really don't think you should take it personally. I doubt he was trying to snub you.
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post #17 of 89
5/30/08 at 9:56am
Thread Starter 
I wish that wasn't the case, but these are the rudest people I have ever met. My husband thinks that we should completely disown them, but for his mothers sake I try to always be nice. I take as much as I can, but if they ever put down my kids it's over.
Proud Army wife to Sgt. Roy Freeman currently serving at Camp Taji, Iraq and mother to Trace 11-22-06 and Jon Thomas 2-10-08
http://dreamcakery.blogspot.com
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Proud Army wife to Sgt. Roy Freeman currently serving at Camp Taji, Iraq and mother to Trace 11-22-06 and Jon Thomas 2-10-08
http://dreamcakery.blogspot.com
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post #18 of 89
5/30/08 at 10:02am
I agree with dragonflydreams!!! Make something absolutely decadent and beautiful and with the biggest smile on your face put your cake next to that crappy, mass produced, nasty tasting, so-called confection( and I use that term confection very, very loosely.

See which one gets eaten first.

And then just smile to yourself when that monstrosity is still there.
Kathy
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Kathy
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post #19 of 89
5/30/08 at 10:06am
Quote:
Originally Posted by amy2197

anyboyd got any delicious cupcake ideas?



I made white chocolate cupcakes and filled them with strawberry cream cheese filling. They were a hit. Everybody ate those and forgot I had made a 3-tiered cake too (in the same flavor).

I hate how rude people can be. I say bring the cupcakes - say that you just wanted to make the birthday girl a little something special. Let the stingy brother see how much $$ he wasted when no one eats the Wal-Mart cake. It may have been cheaper, but if no one eats it, then he might as well have just thrown his $$ in the trash. icon_twisted.gif You could also graciously apologize, in the event the cake is not eaten, for bringing so many cupcakes that the cake ended up being a waste. icon_evil.gif
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post #20 of 89
5/30/08 at 10:19am
You know, my aunt (a great sponsor mine) told me once that she didn't ask me to make the cake because she told it would be too much. I was so not offended. Maybe he told he was doing you a favor?
Cake decorating ROCKS!!
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Cake decorating ROCKS!!
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post #21 of 89
5/30/08 at 10:30am
Maybe it was just an innocent misunderstanding.Maybe they thought that baking a cake is alot of trouble and thought that they were saving you from the trouble. Don't take it personal. People do and say things that we don't always understand but I find that most people do things out of kindness and are misunderstood.especially if messages are getting told second hand. Some people just have trouble excepting what they might consider a hand out.Just take it for what it is worth and go to the party and have a good time.
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post #22 of 89
5/30/08 at 10:30am
I wouldn't bring anything if you weren't asked to, that would just make you look petty and fan the flames of whatever family nastiness already exists.

If these people are nasty, you know what you're going to expect, so don't be surprised when they deliver. Don't waste your time dropping to their level, just don't eat any of the nasty Walmart cake when you're there. If someone makes a remark about you not eating any you can just say that you're not hungry, or just take a piece and don't eat any. The best revenge for people like this is to not feed into their foolishness, since staying above the mess will frustrate them more than if you got into it with them.
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http://www.acaketorememberva.blogspot.com
http://www.facebook.com/acaketoremember
http://www.youtube.com/karabuntin
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post #23 of 89
5/30/08 at 10:33am
Quote:
Originally Posted by costumeczar

I wouldn't bring anything if you weren't asked to, that would just make you look petty and fan the flames of whatever family nastiness already exists.

If these people are nasty, you know what you're going to expect, so don't be surprised when they deliver. Don't waste your time dropping to their level, just don't eat any of the nasty Walmart cake when you're there. If someone makes a remark about you not eating any you can just say that you're not hungry, or just take a piece and don't eat any. The best revenge for people like this is to not feed into their foolishness, since staying above the mess will frustrate them more than if you got into it with them.



I totally agree with this post. Oh, I would SOOOO want to do something, don't get me wrong. BUT, staying above it all would show "CLASS". Also, (and I KNOW people will throw stale cake balls at me for this) I would eat some WalMart cake. Actually, I LIKE our WalMart Cake. Take a bite or two and smile! Be pleasant! It will KILL them!

Beth
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post #24 of 89
5/30/08 at 10:44am
My two worthless cents agree with those who say don't do anything. Let it roll, its probably not worth starting a family war over. Some people are really rude and I am sorry it was your family (that sucks!) But moving on is probably the best and easiest way to handle it.

~Alicia

Ps your cakes are very very cute!
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post #25 of 89
5/30/08 at 10:45am
I have in laws like this, but they trump yours: They specifically TELL me (if it's a potluck or something)...NOT to bring a cake.

Me: Sure we'll come, what should I bring? (without mentioning cake)
MIL: We already have cake.
Me: Ok...so what would you like me to bring?
MIL: Well, we already have dessert, so don't bring cake.
Me: No problem. What should I bring?!
MIL: Oh...I don't know...maybe some chips? Did I mention, we don't need cake.

(this from the woman who was happy for me to make her wedding cake FOR FREE, and a stacked book cake for a grad party for 150 FOR FREE)

And you know what? I'm happy to oblige. I wouldn't want to waste my precious time baking for their ungrateful, back-biting, spiteful butts anyway. I'm the only one in our extended family who is a gourmet cook, and they all know it, so I think it's hilarious to show up with something I stopped and grabbed at the grocery store deli for their potlucks...just like they do for mine...still in the grocery store clear plastic container...MWHAHAHAHA (evil scientist laughter)

Don't even blink. Just show up emptyhanded and enjoy the party, and when they ask you if you want a piece of cake, do like me: Smile brightly and say, "Oh...no thank you! I get so much cake at home. Is that jello salad over there..."

icon_twisted.gif can you tell I have issues with my inlaws? tapedshut.gif
www.cakesbystefanie.com
When pricing cake, remember mom's advice: Try taking 150 guests in formal wedding attire to a nice restaurant for dessert, and see if you can get them all a piece of fresh, decadent, custom-designed cake for less than $4.00/sv!
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www.cakesbystefanie.com
When pricing cake, remember mom's advice: Try taking 150 guests in formal wedding attire to a nice restaurant for dessert, and see if you can get them all a piece of fresh, decadent, custom-designed cake for less than $4.00/sv!
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post #26 of 89
5/30/08 at 10:47am
If I were you,
I wouldn't make anything to take to the party- makes you look petty.
But I also wouldn't eat the wal mart cake either.
If they ask you why just tell them your stomach isnt feeling well or something.

I also however would absolutely limit my interaction with these people, especially if your husband thought so in the first place.
You can always spend time with your MIL if you get along well, its not written anywhere that you have to go out of your way to interact with people who think less of you.
For in the end we will protect only what we love, love only what we understand, and understand only what we are taught.
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For in the end we will protect only what we love, love only what we understand, and understand only what we are taught.
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post #27 of 89
5/30/08 at 1:24pm
Love your post homecook!
I'm in the same boat with my in-laws, it's like our family is jealous of the talent that us CCers have right? Why can't our families be more supportive instead?

I totally agree with homecook, don't bring a darn thing & rise above it! That is now my plan for the upcoming parties my in-laws have! Great Advice!
I'm just going to give it all to God. Lord knows I don't know what I'm doing!
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I'm just going to give it all to God. Lord knows I don't know what I'm doing!
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post #28 of 89
5/30/08 at 1:49pm
I vote with the others in NOT taking anything. Makes you the bigger person.

Now about the Wal-mart cake, when I attend an event that has a Costco or Wal-mart cake & someone asks if I made it I calmly & sweetly say, with a big smile, "Do you see me eating any of it?"
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post #29 of 89
5/30/08 at 1:50pm
Thread Starter 
Thank you everyone for your opinions. I've decided not to take anything. If I do then they will not say anything to me, they will say things about me to my mil who will then have to spend her day(which should be happy) defending me.
Proud Army wife to Sgt. Roy Freeman currently serving at Camp Taji, Iraq and mother to Trace 11-22-06 and Jon Thomas 2-10-08
http://dreamcakery.blogspot.com
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Proud Army wife to Sgt. Roy Freeman currently serving at Camp Taji, Iraq and mother to Trace 11-22-06 and Jon Thomas 2-10-08
http://dreamcakery.blogspot.com
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post #30 of 89
5/30/08 at 2:00pm
. . . hold your head high . . . thumbs_up.gif
. . . Think of things not as they are . . . but as they might be . . . Don't merely dream . . . but create!!!
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. . . Think of things not as they are . . . but as they might be . . . Don't merely dream . . . but create!!!
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