I have such an issue with taking money from friends and family for my cakes!! I'm driving myself nuts! Help me!

In the past, I have done cakes as gifts for friends and family and I was okay with it because it was part of my gift for whatever the occasion may be. Well, I just did a wreath cake (10" bundt) iced in BC with fondant accents for a really close friend of the family. This will be my second 'paid for' cake and the first one was for her also.
With the first one, it was just a 9" 2-layer round birthday cake with a few fondant accents. She picked it up and gave me $30 for it. I was only going to accept $15 to cover ingredients with a little extra but she insisted and ran out literally before I could give her any money back.
I thought that was a lot for her to pay at first but then my DH keeps telling me that I do "custom" cakes and they should cost more than the supermarket cakes. So, I talked myself into it being an okay price.

Anyway, now she ordered a second cake and I just assumed she would give me the $30 for this one also. Well, she calls and talks to DH (I was at the grocery store) and says "oh, she never told me how much it was. I'm not going to fight her on it this time." What?! Now I don't know what to do. I feel so uncomfortable asking for money from close friends and family. So, she comes to pick it up a little while ago and asks how much. (side note: she brought a christmas gift for my daughter with her which adds to my guilt)
I stuck with the amount from last time and asked if she felt comfortable paying $30 and she said 'sure, no problem'. But, I feel like she wasn't expecting me to charge that. I think she probably felt that she over-paid last time because of my reaction to the amount. So, she probably expected to just pay me for ingredients this time. But I don't know.

arghhhhh... help me get over this! I have such an issue! I can't stand asking for money but I eventually want to turn this into a business.

I know I have to make up a set price list and just go by it but I think I'm subconciously avoiding this task.

I think when it comes to friends and family and they give us money it feels like charity. At least it does to me. If you can sit down and make a price list and then give it out then there will be no questions. If you want to say to friends and family, these are my normal prices but I would like to give you X% discount then great. That is what I have done. I haven't started selling cakes since I am not legal but have told my mom and other people once I go get legal that I will be charging these prices but they get 20% off. That way there is no uncomfortable feelings.

Unfortunately, you set the standard. Fix it now, before it snowballs. You might have to eat that cake...no pun intended! In the future, when asked to do a cake, you HAVE to set a formal price. I've told my family and friends that this is not a hobby, but a second job. I have to cover my ingredients and my labor. Often if I don't have a price off hand, I'll tell them, "let me calculate my costs and I'll call you back with a total". That lets them know up front that this is not a freebie. One of the smartest things I've ever done was to take the time to create a cost analysis so that I can give immediate quotes for cakes.
Someone on here once said that if you were a realtor, no one would expect you to give them a house for nothing. I think that was so well put and clearly describes our predicament.
Good luck!

Sharon

I feel the same way. When a coworker came to pick up her daughters birthday cake, I had never told her a price b/c quite honestly I wouldn't have charge her, but she hands me $40 dollars but says to me its not nearly enough. She wanted to run and get more money. I was like YES, it is plenty! I really felt guilty charging for my time. I have fun doing it and it relieves my stress(most of the time) from my regular job, so I almost feel like I owe them for letting me make it.

Anyway, I have read some folks here have friends and family purchase the ingredients in order to make it. They give them a list of items and the friend/family brings them items. I think I've liked this way the most.

Hope that helps.

I don't feel comfortable asking friends and family for money. What I usually do when they ask how much, I just tell them how much I spent on supplies and how long it took me. Then I tell them to pay me whatever they want. So far, I got $25 for an 11x15 cake and $40 for a 9x13. I spent $40 on on materials alone for a 2 tiered cake for my nephew's first birthday along with bringing him a gift, and she gave me $10 in Bath and Body Works stuff. So, some are more generous than others, but I feel I'm still learning and not yet confident in my abilities to ask a large price yet.

By the way I just looked at the wreath cake. Worth MORE than $30 IMO.

OK, your Wreath Cake, IMO is worth waaaay more than the $30 you asked for, you did all that little detail in the pine/green needles!! I couldn't believe my eyes!! It is a gorgeous cake and a GREAT idea, BTW! So really, don't feel guilty, as your DH said, that is a custom made cake and in NO grocery store you will find such a beautiful cake! Cheer up and just know that your work is worth WAY more than that and the the $30 you got is an excellent price (too good actually), one I would consider to be a price with a good discount for a good friend or family! I honestly think that cake is worth close to $50 or $60 (in my area anyway)
Oh and please... share how you did the needles and your bonsai (I'm crazy about that cake!)
Thanks and SMILE! You work is beautiful!

I have issues charging too, but honey that cake is worth way more than just $30!!!! The details are amazing. Charge what you are worth otherwise down the road you'll regret it! You don't do grocery store cakes so you can't follow their pricing, you make quality good and the calibur of your cakes will never be seen in a chain store bakery because they are on a very short time schedual per cake. You do great work and deserve to get paid for it.

Friends I now charge/////if all you do is make cakes I can assure you you do not want to make any more without payment of some sort or another/ basically everything cost a fortune and my sitting up all night requires something!!!Mind you its hard.

Thank you all so much for the encouragement. I feel sooooo much better after your responses. You made me tear up a bit. You're all so sweet and kind.
I feel like I can actually finish my housework without this whole thing consuming me now. LOL

Thank you nefgaby. The needles were actually done with the #134 tip so they weren't as bad as it seems. As for the bonsai, feel free to PM me at any time. I'd be happy to give directions.

Love the wreath cake! For future reference.... cost of materials (ingredients and structural things i.e. cake boards etc), add to this 2% of the total of the cost of materials, then multiply by 4 (or some use 3) and you have the cost of your cake. In order to get a break down of the cost of ingredients you will intially have to do some math. As an example, below is my cost break down of some of the items I use.
Eggs.. $.083 each

Butter. $1.16 per cup

Shortening. $.36 per cup

Flour. $.29 per cup

Vegetable oil. $.10 per 1/3 cup

Cake Mix. $.92 each

Sugar. $.20 per cup

Pudding Mix. $.60 each

Confectioners Sugar . $.165 per cup

Cake Flour. $.21 per cup

Cocoa . $.05 per Tbsp

Eggnog. $6.88 per qt.

Vanilla Extract . $.04 per tsp

Butter Extract . $.04 per tsp

Cream Cheese. $.90 per 8 oz ( ½ cup)

Sour Cream $1.00 per 16 oz. $.50 per 8 oz. (1 cup)

Oreo Cookies . $3.39 per 18 oz package

White Wilton Fondant . $6.49 per lb.

Colored Wilton Fondant . $8.00 per lb.

Gumpaste. $8.99 per lb.

Satin Ice Fondant . $4.60 per lb.

Meringue Powder . $1.00 per oz, $.33 per Tbsp

Color Flow . $.53 per oz.

Piping Gel . $.40 per oz.

6 Round Cake Board . $.32 each

8 Round Cake Board . $.35 each

10 Round Cake Board . $.36 each

12 Round Cake Board . $.66 each

14 Round Cake Board . $.95 each

10 x 14 Rectangular Cake Board . $.80 each






Two layer 8 round or square cake made with 1.5 mixes, frosted, filled, and basic decorations with butter cream frosting = $5. 67 + $.36 for cake board and + 2% ( $.1 for misc. and electricity totals $ 6.21. $6.21 x 4= $24.84

Very Easy, guilt free way, set a price, give them 20% off it. With a big smille on your face, you are the one making them a favor by giving them a discount.

Oh I don't think your friend thinks that cake is not worth the money she paid. I'm sure she KNOWS it is worth so much more. Don't worry about it.

Your cakes are down right beautiful and you should have no problems charging for them.

I fully understand how you feel though. I hate to charge and will just take whatever someone wants to give me. Since I can not really legally charge where I live I figure if I don't ask for money and just take what they give me as a thank you gift then I am ok. I really don't care what I get paid as I don't want to do this as business anyway. To me that would turn this fun thing into a job and I don't want that. I have to much fun with my hobby. This way I can do them when I want not when I have to.

I just saw your amazing picture and you're lucky I don't jump on a plane and come over there and shake some sense into you!

if these are the kind of cakes you produce as a beginner...I'd hate to see what you do in a few years!

shessssssssssssh..some people...stop hiding your talent under a basket, !!!

khoudek: I love how you broke all of that down! That will someday come in handy for me when I start selling cakes!!!

I printed out the break down that will come in real handy.

The more cakes I see on this site the more I feel I should hang up my apron. Some of these cakes are unbeliveable, like this wreath cake. The talent on this site is amazing.

I was thinking you should give your prices up front with confidience. A price for basic design and a higher price for lots of detail may be good.

But, girl you need to be stern you have a real talent and if they don't like your prices, let's see them find a cake that can hold up to your's for that price.

If I did cakes like yours I would be prancing like a show horse.

you guys are the best. thank you all so much. this whole cake decorating thing is pretty new to me. its so easy for me to tell someone else that they should be charging more but for some reason i can't do it. i'm going to work on this though. i know its a skill that i have to develop otherwise i will never be able to turn this into a business.

khoudek: thanks so much for the break down of everything. i really appreciate you sharing that information.

RisqueBusiness: LOL... please don't shake me. i'm a delicate flower.

You're welcome everyone. However, realize that my price breakdown is for how much things cost in my area. I just posted it so you could see how I do it.

Hi, Cakerator!

Are you in the US?

You bake the cakes and give me a deposit slip. I have no problem taking money on your behalf, and will gladly deposit it into your account for you.

As long as it's green and American, it's alright with me!

Theresa

I have to agree with everyone else - that wreath cake is worth way more than $30.00.

You are much too talented to give away your cakes!

That cake was amazing. I'm thinking more like $60-$75 for something that detailed. It doesn't matter if you say it wasn't hard. Ice skaters tell you it's not hard to skate backwards at high speed! (and then jump!)

Excellent work on your cakes, be proud of your work and start charging dad gum it!!!

Diane