Help me stand Up to my mother...... - Page 2

See that's the problem she doesn't do anything for us except complain whenever we need something. My brother is the one she breaks her back for and he's a major screw up in and out of jail left and right. But the only reason I feel she should have to pay for the cake is because she's ordering it for other people ya know... if I give it to her she'll continue to want it free in the future and like the last time that cake was really really elaborate (the wrestling cake) and was out of my skill level some but I did the best I could and got nothing for it... she says the $50.00 came a week later... it was a few weeks later and was never mentioned towards the cake until I brought up the fact she didn't pay for it....

Dad... he's the one that does everything and anything for us. So him I don't mind doing stuff for. But mom takes total advantage of us and like with baby sitting, she doesn't ask us she tells us. My DH told her the other night when she said "you guys have the boys over night on saturday" he said no we can't we've got plans already I'm sorry. She laughed and said ok so you can pick them up around 3 ok? lol. And she also informed me that we'd have all 3 boys for an entire week in October while they go on vacation... no offer to do anything for us in exchange... dad offered to buy groceries for the week they'd be here and give me his truck to transport them back and forth that week.

She just doesn't care really.... She knows we are struggling so bad right now to even make ends meet she knows my DH's mother helps us whenever she can with grocery money or bill money or whatever since we only have one vehicle and no way for me to go to work currently... she doesn't care...

I also made her the all white funeral reception cake. It was for her best friend whom I've known for quite sometime but have never really gotten real close to... but I know her and like her so I did it. I had to borrow money from my dad just to make the damn cake because living at their house in a leaking basement always being sick and stuff.... (just to make sure yall know it wasn't really all that great of a helping hand she gave us by letting us stay and then kicking us out into the street like she's done so many times before like when my daughter was only 6 weeks old after MAKING me move in there...) anyway sorry... I had to borrow the money for the stuff because everything I had on hand got wet during a rain storm (basement leaks everytime it rains hard) and had to be trashed then I didn't have a box or board big enough for it so I had to borrow that from him. He asked me "Who the hell is this cake for and why aren't you being paid for it?" right infront of mom... I looked at her looked at him and said "it's for mom to take to XXX dad's funeral tomorrow" he asked her why she wasn't paying me and she replied very bluntly and matter of fact like "I shouldn't have to pay her for it it's the least she can do" for what?! listening to you complain every day? washing and drying all the laundry in the house? cleaning the house? waiting on you hand and foot so dad doesn't have to at 72 yrs old? taking care of the kids so you don't have to get out of bed?! why is it the least I can do? then she starts crying and goes to her room and slams the door... it's always the same...

People are bringing up the mother issue... I love her dearly don't get me wrong. But growing up wasn't like the typical family. She allowed things to happen under her roof with full knowledge of them happening and not doing anything about it. She carried me for 9 months yes, but she went back to work 3 weeks later and I went into day care where I stayed with my sister until our father came to get us, took us home fed us, bathed us, and tucked us into bed after spending an hour on our hair. Mom never did anything but cook. Then when I was 10 I got into trouble in school like most kids do. All that happened was I got detention for not turning in a work assignment on time... She disowned me. Literally. She told my father "I'm done I've had it with her she's yours Beth's mine I don't want anything to do with her at all ever again" and that was the end. We moved when I was 12 she suddenly forgot how to do anything like cooking, or fixing her own drink or anything except isolating herself in her room and sleeping all the time. She has worked all our lives yes, but she's never put any of that money towards us. My father has worked and is still working after he's been retired for a year just to pay the bills. Her money pays for her car, her half of the car insurance, her credit cards, and her nights out. Not to mention her breakfast and lunch at mcdonalds every single day. Her money doesn't go to my nephews care either. They get SSI because of their mother's situation and she uses that (within the guidelines of the law) to take care of their things like clothing and stuff.

I never had the typical life you guys did... I wish I did I've always wished I had that kind of life and I strive to give my daughter what I didn't have. I never had anyone tell me they loved me on a daily basis. I never had hugs and kisses good night or a pat on the back for a job well done... never had any of that. So I'm sorry it may sound selfish and totally wrong but I don't feel I owe her anything...