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How many of you have supportive husbands? - Page 9
- costumeczar
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First let me say that I love my husband dearly and he's great in most aspects of our life together and with my caking he is supportive .... sort of...it's really confusing at times. One minute he's bragging me up and the next he makes me feel like I"m wasting my time. For example, I've done several cakes for clients of his who've all raved about my cakes to him and he loves to come home and tell me all about it and he seems so proud. He also promotes me to people all the time. He's also great about running to the store if need be or helping out with a delivery, etc. and on occasion, he's even surprised me by cleaning up the kitchen while I'm out making a delivery. However, he's also really good at making me feel guilty for doing it. He constantly reminds me that I'm not getting what I'm worth out of it and I spend too much time making each cake "perfect", and that it takes away from "our time" because, let's face it, cakes are usually a weekend gig. I do this basically as a hobby because there is just no way to make a decent wage off of caking in my area (unless I take on so many orders that I'm working round the clock) and thankfully my DH brings home the bacon so to speak so I'm not pressured to "make money". I keep my business separate from the home account and what profits I make are mine to keep and spend as I so wish so that's never an issue. But sometimes I feel like he just doesn't consider this a "real job". Take last week for instance. I spent the entire week working on a cake and six different baked goods for my parents 50th Anniversary party and his only comment "your crazy to do all this and for nothing". Seriously?? It's for my parents! I was exhausted by the end of the week and not once did I get sympathy or a "good job" out of it from him -- well, at least not until after all the raves about my desserts from all the party attendees. Like I said, confusing.
It sounds like he's proud of you but also concerned that you're working yourself too hard at the same time. I wouldn't look at that as being negative, but as trying to protect you, know what I mean? Quite frankly, that sounds like a more realistic scenario than having a husband who's constantly supportive and never has a gripe about the time that it takes to do cakes. Nobody is CONSTANTLY happy for someone else unless they're a robot. Everybody has a whiny moment every now and then.
- jason_kraft
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It sounds like he's proud of you but also concerned that you're working yourself too hard at the same time. I wouldn't look at that as being negative, but as trying to protect you, know what I mean?
Agreed, I would do the same thing if my wife was working long hours for menial wages. When I put together the pricing structure for our bakery I made sure both of us would be paid appropriately for our contributions.
When you're busy baking and decorating it's sometimes difficult to see the big picture from a business perspective, e.g. how much you are getting paid per hour to work on someone else's cake. If you aren't getting paid enough, you need to lower your costs (cheaper ingredients and/or more efficient work processes) or increase your prices. If you think you are being paid enough, it might be beneficial to take a look at your costs and revenues and share that information with your husband so he won't be as concerned.
The Bakery Business Perspective
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The Bakery Business Perspective
An experimental blog
Recent Articles: The Magic Pricing Formula • Copyright Law • Starting a Business
- mcaulir
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I almost scared to reply to this with any kind of negativity given all the amazingly supportive husbands there seem to be out there but...
First let me say that I love my husband dearly and he's great in most aspects of our life together and with my caking he is supportive .... sort of...it's really confusing at times. One minute he's bragging me up and the next he makes me feel like I"m wasting my time. For example, I've done several cakes for clients of his who've all raved about my cakes to him and he loves to come home and tell me all about it and he seems so proud. He also promotes me to people all the time. He's also great about running to the store if need be or helping out with a delivery, etc. and on occasion, he's even surprised me by cleaning up the kitchen while I'm out making a delivery. However, he's also really good at making me feel guilty for doing it. He constantly reminds me that I'm not getting what I'm worth out of it and I spend too much time making each cake "perfect", and that it takes away from "our time" because, let's face it, cakes are usually a weekend gig. I do this basically as a hobby because there is just no way to make a decent wage off of caking in my area (unless I take on so many orders that I'm working round the clock) and thankfully my DH brings home the bacon so to speak so I'm not pressured to "make money". I keep my business separate from the home account and what profits I make are mine to keep and spend as I so wish so that's never an issue. But sometimes I feel like he just doesn't consider this a "real job". Take last week for instance. I spent the entire week working on a cake and six different baked goods for my parents 50th Anniversary party and his only comment "your crazy to do all this and for nothing". Seriously?? It's for my parents! I was exhausted by the end of the week and not once did I get sympathy or a "good job" out of it from him -- well, at least not until after all the raves about my desserts from all the party attendees. Like I said, confusing.
Spouses don't always 'get' each others' interests. My husband races one of his cars and is constantly fiddlying with various engine parts to try to optimise speeds, or researching racing methods. All that seems like a a complete waste of time to me, and I do get annoyed sometimes when he spends the weekend doing that instead of things as a family.
However, I recognise that he works all week and needs a hobby, like I do, and that although I don't understand the attraction, greasy engine bits are obviously fascinating to him.
Men sometimes don't quite get the aesthetics of pretty cakes and desserts, especially when they see how long it takes, and that it all gets eaten, anyway. For us, it's a matter of each allocating time for the other to do their hobby, and to understand when something that doesn't seem very important, is important to the other.
- kansasjill
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Mine is amazing! We've been together since high school and married for 18 years. He knows that sugar has always been my passion but raising 5 kids while starting and managing our main business didn't leave a lot of time for it. Now that the business' (2 locations) are running smoothly and the kids are not tiny babies (15 years down to 2 years) I have had more time to explore my love of the pastry arts. We are in the process of putting a kitchen in downstairs -my dream space- and my business is taking off. I don't do it for the money but because I really, really love it. He knows that and he is extremely patient with my online cake store shopping, late nights in the kitchen and hours on Pinterest and cakecentral. He's even great about me traveling to take a class every once in a while. I'm a blessed girl.
- Sassy74
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My husband is incredibly supportive. 12 years ago, I left a career I loved, that was very challenging and rewarding, to be a SAHM and homeschool our two fantastic kids. It's challenging and rewarding in different ways, but being a caker has been a wonderful outlet for me. I'm a hobby baker, so it's not an overwhelming commitment but when I do a wedding cake or big celebration cake, I'm sucked into a cake vortex for days lol. He has never, ever complained about the mess, the time I spend doing it, nothing. He has helped me immensely in so many ways. He's my delivery helper (hey, I can't lift these heavy suckers), he's the ONLY one who carves cakes in this house because he can look at a stacked block of cakes and see the pirate ship inside, and I can NOT, haha! He has helped me with figure sculpting, he repairs my airbrush when I'm ready to throw it across the room, and he's the official taste tester :). Couldn't do this without his support!
- Peanut-Butter
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- bct806
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Mine is great! He even helps out when I get really stressed over something. (No decorating skills but he can clean, cook dinner, and bake the cake if needed!) Not sure what I would do without him.
Throw it in the batter and hope for the best!
Throw it in the batter and hope for the best!
- BrandisBaked
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He is now my EX-husband.
My current husband is amazing and everything my last one wasn't. He even sold his 67 camaro (his dream car) so I'd have room in the garage for all my cake stuff.
- Drxkfairy
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So my soon to be husband is so great we have been throw a lot together. We have been together for 5 years live together for 4. He has pushed me when i need the push has always supported me in what ever I wanted to do. With his last push he has helped me find a job I'm in love with. I'm now teaching cake decorating. He has paid for some cake decorating classes when we really didn't have the money to. Witch is how I found my job. He helps with anything i need help with like keeping the kids busy when I'm working on cakes. Helps me come up with ideas and taste test some my cakes when I'm playing with new recipes and never complains about anything like the money for supplies, all the long hours. But the other day he said the sweetest thing " I'm going to start taking your cake classes." and when i asked him why he said " because I what to help you with your cakes." He is the best I cant wait to be his wife soon I could have asked for a better person to spend the rest of my life with.
Drxkfairy
Drxkfairy
- How many of you have supportive husbands?
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