Customer Asked For My Recipe - How Do I Respond?

Decorating By 1234me Updated 31 May 2007 , 3:00am by CelebrationsbyLori

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1234me Posted 29 May 2007 , 2:24pm
post #1 of 69

Ugh - I hate when people do that. So rude. When people ask me face to face, I usually tell them I don't know it off the top of my head but list off the ingredients but never the specific amounts. This customer is asking by email. I wouldn't mind giving it if she wasn't just a town over and 5 minutes from where I live - she could take some of my business. Any tips on how to handle this?

68 replies
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ShirleyW Posted 29 May 2007 , 2:28pm
post #2 of 69

Would a bakery or restaurant give out their recipe? I doubt it, and I don't think most people would ask or expect that they would. I don't know why people feel they should do that with a home baker, I guess they consider us to be their neighbors or friends and feel comfortable in asking. I would find a polite way of saying no.

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Renaejrk Posted 29 May 2007 , 2:34pm
post #3 of 69

Yes - definitely find a polite way of telling her that you can't give away all your secrets - it's not good business! If it were a very close friend that you trusted it might be okay, but this is very different. Maybe you can tell her that eventually you may compile a cookbook that she could purchase!

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bobwonderbuns Posted 29 May 2007 , 2:41pm
post #4 of 69

When my students ask for my buttercream recipe, I give them a generic buttercream recipe and tell them to play with it and make it their own. I tell them "you don't want to make my recipe, you want to make it your own." You might do that with her, if it's say a yellow cake recipe, tell her to do an internet search and find a yellow cake recipe she likes and to play with flavoring it. Give her a few options. That way you look helpful and not stingy but you haven't given away your trade secrets! icon_twisted.gif

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OhMyGoodies Posted 29 May 2007 , 2:42pm
post #5 of 69

You could always tell her very politely that it's an old family recipe and you've been sworn to secracy icon_wink.gif or say that it's not your recipe it's an online friends recipe and you promised to never share it with anyone else. icon_wink.gif

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indydebi Posted 29 May 2007 , 2:43pm
post #6 of 69

Remember the Calgon commercial from the 60's?

"Ancient Chinese Secret!"

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BrandisBaked Posted 29 May 2007 , 2:44pm
post #7 of 69

Since I do specialy baking for diabetics and people with food allergies, I am asked quite often for my recipes - or if I would put together a cookbook. My answer? "I'm sorry... it took me a long time to perfect my recipes, and I prefer not to give them out."

Simple as that.

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noosie Posted 29 May 2007 , 2:44pm
post #8 of 69

Out of curiosity, does she decorate and sell cakes as well?? If not, I don't see a problem in giving her the recipe. Here on cc we are constantly exchanging and posting recipes and g-d only knows how many members/anonymous members see the postings and recipes.

If she is a possible competitor, maybe you might feel more comfortable sharing a similar recipe you have used in the past and not the exact recipe you currently use rather than saying no flat out. (sounds a little sneaky, but maybe a more polite response????)

Not really sure, just my advice. Good luck! icon_redface.gificon_redface.gif

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aobodessa Posted 29 May 2007 , 2:45pm
post #9 of 69

I had the same problem once, but with a florist whose flowers I was putting into one of my wedding cakes. He was not going to give me the flowers until I told him how I was going to keep them "fresh" in the cake! [The NERVE of some people!!!]

I just told him that I don't ask for his trade secrets and I don't give my trade secrets away ... to ANYONE ... and that basically shut him up. Perhaps you can e-mail this woman back and tell her that you "don't give out my trade secrets; if I did that, my cakes wouldn't be special and unique from everyone else's now, would they?" If she still insists, say it again. It will become a mantra and she should eventually get the hint.

HTH,

Odessa

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berryblondeboys Posted 29 May 2007 , 2:46pm
post #10 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by indydebi

Remember the Calgon commercial from the 60's?

"Ancient Chinese Secret!"




OMG - NO ONE I know remembers that commercial except for me!!! I was a kid when it was on and I remember someone coming to their dry cleaning (or was it a laundromat?) store and commenting on how soft it was and wanting to know how they did it - they smiled (I think it was he) and said, "Ancient Chinese secret!" I use that ALL the time for secrets and NO ONE GETS IT! LOL I think there were a couple variations of this commercial too.

My husband REALLY doesn't get it since he grew up in Yugoslavia! LOL

Melissa

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mdutcher Posted 29 May 2007 , 2:46pm
post #11 of 69

Yeah, I hate this too!! I say Thanks, I'm so glad you like it! I can't give out the recipe because I'm working on starting my own business.
That does the trick. People understand. If they try to make you feel bad, put it back on them and ask them "do you ask your fav. restaurant for their recipes? I love Rocky mountain chocolate factory's truffles! Do I ask them for the recipe?...NO. I go order it when I need a fix. If I knew the recipe, I would make them myself. That's one less customer for them."

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2sdae Posted 29 May 2007 , 2:47pm
post #12 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by indydebi

Remember the Calgon commercial from the 60's?

"Ancient Chinese Secret!"



LOL!!!!! THAT REMINDED ME OF THAT COMMERCIAL FOR "PEARL CREAM FROM THE ORIENT....ANCIENT CHINESE SECRET!"
It came out in the 8os and was all over T.V.!
But back to the question at hand...I have to vote for letting her know you cannot poss give out your exact recipe but direct her to a similar one and maybe give her some ideas on how to play it up to her liking.
K.F.C. didn't divulge their 11 spices and ingredients for a reason either ya know?

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bobwonderbuns Posted 29 May 2007 , 2:49pm
post #13 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by aobodessa

I had the same problem once, but with a florist whose flowers I was putting into one of my wedding cakes. He was not going to give me the flowers until I told him how I was going to keep them "fresh" in the cake! [The NERVE of some people!!!]




icon_surprised.gif Are you serious?? Honestly!! He didn't per chance wear blue eyeliner and liked to talk about salad dressing, did he?? icon_cool.gif

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bobwonderbuns Posted 29 May 2007 , 2:51pm
post #14 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by indydebi

Remember the Calgon commercial from the 60's?

"Ancient Chinese Secret!"




Ancient Chinese Secret??? I thought it was some broad in a bubble bath yelling "Calgon take me away!..." icon_razz.gif

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berryblondeboys Posted 29 May 2007 , 2:55pm
post #15 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by bobwonderbuns

Quote:
Originally Posted by indydebi

Remember the Calgon commercial from the 60's?

"Ancient Chinese Secret!"



Ancient Chinese Secret??? I thought it was some broad in a bubble bath yelling "Calgon take me away!..." icon_razz.gif




Different era - but yep, that's calgon too.... Hmmm... maybe that's what I need - I need Calgon to "take me away!"

But they must have used this commercial in the early 70s too becasue I was born at the end of 69 and I REMEMBER it.

Yep, the husband telling the customer, "Ancient Chinese secret" and then the wife coming in and taking the box from under the counter or something, questioning with a smirk on her face, "Ancient Chinese Secret, huh?" LOL

melissa

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Narie Posted 29 May 2007 , 2:59pm
post #16 of 69

OK, I understand why you think it is rude- and yes it is. But looked at from another point of view, it can be seen as a compliment. Your product is so good that she/he wants to replicate it. If the person has any brains, she knows there is a strong possiblilty that she is going to get a refusal. But she doesn't know for sure unless she asks. So she asked.
Take the whole situation as a compliment and politely thank her for the compliment, but sorry your recipes are are trade secrets- like Bush beans and the 'Duke' the Golden retriever who keeps trying to sell the family recipe.

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FromScratch Posted 29 May 2007 , 3:03pm
post #17 of 69

I'd just politely tell them that you have worked years to develop your recipes and you aren't giving out yoru recipes.. Something like.. 'Thank you for the compliment and request for my recipe however they are a family secret that have taken years to develop.' That or just ignoring it and hoping it goes away.. icon_wink.gif

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Lejla Posted 29 May 2007 , 3:04pm
post #18 of 69

There is another recent commercial about "Bush beans"I don't know if anybody seen this comercial,but just give her an answer that dog owner said to his dog when the dog asked him when he can give the secret recipe out.The answer was;"When the pigs fly".The next segment of the commercial was the dog having pigs on the top of the roof with skateboard attached to them,and boards as wing.He was teaching them how to fly,lol.

I think it is so rude for anyone to even ask something like that.She knows what you do.And why would she even ask you is beyond me.

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2sdae Posted 29 May 2007 , 3:06pm
post #19 of 69

It is a compliment but I'd have to refuse on the note that you need your recipes to continue in business.

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bobwonderbuns Posted 29 May 2007 , 3:07pm
post #20 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by berryblondeboys

Quote:
Originally Posted by bobwonderbuns

Quote:
Originally Posted by indydebi

Remember the Calgon commercial from the 60's?

"Ancient Chinese Secret!"



Ancient Chinese Secret??? I thought it was some broad in a bubble bath yelling "Calgon take me away!..." icon_razz.gif



Different era - but yep, that's calgon too.... Hmmm... maybe that's what I need - I need Calgon to "take me away!"

But they must have used this commercial in the early 70s too becasue I was born at the end of 69 and I REMEMBER it.

Yep, the husband telling the customer, "Ancient Chinese secret" and then the wife coming in and taking the box from under the counter or something, questioning with a smirk on her face, "Ancient Chinese Secret, huh?" LOL

melissa


Ancient Chinese Secret... The way you describe it sounds vaguely familiar. I remember the "calgon take me away" much better though and I was born in '65! icon_lol.gif

But none of them can top that singing broad "I can bring home the bacon... and fry it up in a pan... and never never let you forget you're a man... cuz I'm a WOMAN!!! da da da..." icon_lol.gif

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tyty Posted 29 May 2007 , 3:13pm
post #21 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by bobwonderbuns

When my students ask for my buttercream recipe, I give them a generic buttercream recipe and tell them to play with it and make it their own. I tell them "you don't want to make my recipe, you want to make it your own." You might do that with her, if it's say a yellow cake recipe, tell her to do an internet search and find a yellow cake recipe she likes and to play with flavoring it. Give her a few options. That way you look helpful and not stingy but you haven't given away your trade secrets! icon_twisted.gif




That is what I do also, give the generic or tell them where to look.

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berryblondeboys Posted 29 May 2007 , 3:15pm
post #22 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by bobwonderbuns



But none of them can top that singing broad "I can bring home the bacon... and fry it up in a pan... and never never let you forget you're a man... cuz I'm a WOMAN!!! da da da..." icon_lol.gif




What was that a commercial for? I can hear the ditty.... Three syllables... something da-da ly? lee? Was it for deodorant! or a shaving product? LOL

And can I just say how neither of these would FLY today? Chinese dry cleaners? a woman cooking and cleaning and seducing? hmm... that last one is still prevalent - women taking care of everything at home.

melissa

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bobwonderbuns Posted 29 May 2007 , 3:17pm
post #23 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by tyty

Quote:
Originally Posted by bobwonderbuns

When my students ask for my buttercream recipe, I give them a generic buttercream recipe and tell them to play with it and make it their own. I tell them "you don't want to make my recipe, you want to make it your own." You might do that with her, if it's say a yellow cake recipe, tell her to do an internet search and find a yellow cake recipe she likes and to play with flavoring it. Give her a few options. That way you look helpful and not stingy but you haven't given away your trade secrets! icon_twisted.gif



That is what I do also, give the generic or tell them where to look.



I've found that if the students (or whomever wanted the recipe) questions me further on it I tell them I worked long and hard to make that recipe my own and I am trying to encourage them in the same direction as people encouraged me. They usually understand.

Also I had an experience once (a bad one), where I did give a cherished recipe to someone. Long story short (and I won't go into all the sordid details), I got burned bigtime on it. I've regretted it ever since and that is why I now give generic recipes. Oh well, live and learn! icon_rolleyes.gif

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berryblondeboys Posted 29 May 2007 , 3:20pm
post #24 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by bobwonderbuns




But none of them can top that singing broad "I can bring home the bacon... and fry it up in a pan... and never never let you forget you're a man... cuz I'm a WOMAN!!! da da da..." icon_lol.gif




and wasn't it: and never never ever forget the romance, cuz you're a woman!!! .... whatever the product name is in three syllables! LOL So much for lasting memory of the product! LOL

How about, "Who wears short-shorts, We wear short-shorts commercial!"

Sorry for hijacking the thread! That last one was for nair or neat or somethinglike that.

Melissa

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cambo Posted 29 May 2007 , 3:20pm
post #25 of 69

I've had to tell folks "thank you for the compliment and I'm so glad you like my cakes/icing, however, the recipe belongs to my business and I don't give it out". I have also told them they can search the internt for a good basic recipe, or even give them the Wilton recipe to play around with. Bottom line, if you don't want to give it out.....don't!

indydebi.....I started laughing reading your "ancient chinese secret" comment! I loved that commercial! Here's the youtube of it, for those of you who think you don't remember it.....I'm sure this will bring it back!


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bobwonderbuns Posted 29 May 2007 , 3:20pm
post #26 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by berryblondeboys

Quote:
Originally Posted by bobwonderbuns



But none of them can top that singing broad "I can bring home the bacon... and fry it up in a pan... and never never let you forget you're a man... cuz I'm a WOMAN!!! da da da..." icon_lol.gif



What was that a commercial for? I can hear the ditty.... Three syllables... something da-da ly? lee? Was it for deodorant! or a shaving product? LOL




I was a little kid when that commercial came out, so I'm probably wrong on this, but I think it was for a perfume called "On-jolie" (sp?) or something like that. I remember it had three syllables though. I think it was that, I just remember the lady walking into the house with a bag of groceries and she started singing and whipping off her jacket and scarf like a millitant pole dancer... icon_eek.gificon_confused.gif I guess she was the first generation "power woman" or some such thing... icon_confused.gificon_cool.gificon_razz.gif

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Sunspotalli Posted 29 May 2007 , 3:21pm
post #27 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by Narie

OK, I understand why you think it is rude- and yes it is. But looked at from another point of view, it can be seen as a compliment. Your product is so good that she/he wants to replicate it. If the person has any brains, she knows there is a strong possiblilty that she is going to get a refusal. But she doesn't know for sure unless she asks. So she asked.
Take the whole situation as a compliment and politely thank her for the compliment, but sorry your recipes are are trade secrets- like Bush beans and the 'Duke' the Golden retriever who keeps trying to sell the family recipe.




I gotta agree with Narie it's a compliment to be asked but just tell her no. Just don't tell her when pigs fly she might be like Duke and hire and actor. Good Luck

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bobwonderbuns Posted 29 May 2007 , 3:21pm
post #28 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by cambo

I've had to tell folks "thank you for the compliment and I'm so glad you like my cakes/icing, however, the recipe belongs to my business and I don't give it out". I have also told them they can search the internt for a good basic recipe, or even give them the Wilton recipe to play around with. Bottom line, if you don't want to give it out.....don't!




And then there's the always popular "I could tell you but then I'd have to kill you..." icon_twisted.gificon_lol.gif

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berryblondeboys Posted 29 May 2007 , 3:22pm
post #29 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by bobwonderbuns

Quote:
Originally Posted by berryblondeboys

Quote:
Originally Posted by bobwonderbuns



But none of them can top that singing broad "I can bring home the bacon... and fry it up in a pan... and never never let you forget you're a man... cuz I'm a WOMAN!!! da da da..." icon_lol.gif



What was that a commercial for? I can hear the ditty.... Three syllables... something da-da ly? lee? Was it for deodorant! or a shaving product? LOL




I was a little kid when that commercial came out, so I'm probably wrong on this, but I think it was for a perfume called "On-jolie" (sp?) or something like that. I remember it had three syllables though. I think it was that, I just remember the lady walking into the house with a bag of groceries and she started singing and whipping off her jacket and scarf like a millitant pole dancer... icon_eek.gificon_confused.gif I guess she was the first generation "power woman" or some such thing... icon_confused.gificon_cool.gificon_razz.gif




Ohh... I think you are right - so I did remember the "ly" part correctly... Hmm... maybe i can blame this commercial for making me BELIEVE I could be the best mom, best career woman, best wife, best housekeeper, best cook and EVERYTHING all at once - sure... no problem!

Melissa

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indydebi Posted 29 May 2007 , 3:23pm
post #30 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by bobwonderbuns

...But none of them can top that singing broad "I can bring home the bacon... and fry it up in a pan... and never never let you forget you're a man... cuz I'm a WOMAN!!! da da da..." icon_lol.gif




omg I HATED that commercial! During the era of women "coming of age" in the middle of the women's liberation movement, here is a commercial that somehow got past Gloria Steinham, planting the expectation that a woman should go to work, spend all day in an office or a factory or a what-have-you, come home and "fry it up in a pan" .... do all the housework, make dinner, clean it up,..... and then STILL have the energy to get all dolled up to "service her man".

Hubby had a video tape of commercials from the 50's ..... there was one that really ticked me off and made him laugh out loud. Some 40-ish year old lady in a car commercial and the guy in the commercial asked her "Do you drive as good as your husband?" to which she replied, "When I'm in my (make of car), I do!" Then the guy in the commercial compliments her on her pretty hat. aaauuuggghhhhh!!!!!!!!!!

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