Ok...so I have two daughters ages 2 and 4. I can not understand how mothers can keep a spotless home. Now you know if your a neat freak. I am wondering how you get it all done. My house isn't even nice and tidy. Everything is unorganized, ugh....It just seems so overwhelming and it's not that I dont do anything, it just come undone. Please if someone can help or give me some hints on what they do. Oh yeah and I don't have a big house. It is only 1200 sq.ft. I just want it to be homey feeling instead of a flop house

I clean one or two rooms a day--straighten and dust if needed. Have a basket for each member of the family and when you straighten a room, put their stuff in their basket and when you are done put it in their room. I have a little sweeper vac that I use to sweep the floors in my living room and kitchen every day. My sons room is always a mess so the door stays closed. I found if I do little things every day it is not overwhelming.

A lot of people swear by Fly Lady, but I found it didn't work for me... I want to get it all organized QUICKLY and then work on the little by little maintaining it. Plus, I can't afford the, "Just toss it" mentality. I've had to carve a little bit each day to post on ebay, craigslist and yard sales. If I would have followed fly lady, I would now be out of over $1500.... can't afford that mentaility.

But I am making it a point to do a set chunk EVERY DAY (and I'm almost done after TWO MONTHS).... it was HORRIBLE. We jus thad too much stuff for this townhouse with no garage and no basement.

I think that - decluttering - is a big part of being able to keep a house tidy and clean. It's hard to clean when you have to spend an hour just putting things away EVERY DAY... SO, really, really look at what you have and decide what you could live without. One day we donated to Salvation Army 10 BIG rubbermaid containers FULL. Plus, I've sold furniture, clothes, lamps, toys, and strollers too and I'm almost done with all of that. As it's gone on, my house got MORE messy as I dumped closets and such, but now that things are thinning out, I am not spending as much time tidying up because it's easier to put something away immiediately.

Now, it would help me TREMENDOUSLY if my 10 year old and my husband would pick up after themselves. I don't think they have a CLUE how much I pick up after them... My husband has a box of thingst o go to his office that is now overflowing for THREE MONTHS near the basement door... He always says he'll get to it, and it sits... UGH!!!

Melissa

Training kids to put away their toys and things when they are done can never start too early. Lots of praise and doing it as a group activity to start would go along way to keeping the clutter under control. Age 2 would be a good starting age and 4 should be already trained.

http://www.flylady.net/

Tons of free information - this lady is good!!!

This is an awesome website, it tells you how to take baby steps to change your habbits and it really works.

My house is NOT organized by any means - but unlike our old home I don't want to crawl in a hole if someone stops by unexpectedly. LOL - OK well some times I do...

Before ds#2 came along I got *very* organized with my cleaning. I use outlook to track my tasks - I would put clean bathrooms on my task list to repeat 1-2x/week. I did ignore the task if the room was clean. One load of laundry is on there for every day of the week. Vacuum upstairs/vacuum downstairs on 2 seperate days once a week. etc.

Since my 2nd child arrived I've not stuck to this well. I'm hoping as he gets older I can get back on track.

What I'm doing right now to keep my head above water is just *do* something. I might get 2 minutes I might get 30 - so I gather laundry/pick up toys/load the dishwasher. Sometimes the job gets finished on the first try - sometimes not until the 4th/5th...but I don't let a mess overwhelm me or assume my kids won't let me finish. Even if I dont finish I feel like I accomplished something.

My aunt says I don't have "Deep Dirt"....just clutter. I don't exactly KNOW what "Deep Dirt"is.....but, I'm pretty glad that I don't have it! LOL

I'm like my MEMAW Polly. I like to "see" what I have. I have books whereever I choose to sit or lie. Never know when the urge to READ might hit me! My decorating supplies, however, ARE put away. Since my son FINALLY bought a house and left home, it's just my husband and me and he even does his own laundry when needed. Now, HIS side of the bedroom....total mess. I just leave it. I've learned to pick my battles. Our bedrooms are upstairs anyway and I NEVER allow company up there!

Alas, my epitaph will NEVER read "She was a great housekeeper" but I HOPE it will read "She never let grass grow under her feet; always moving and always changing"!

Beth in KY

Just my opinion but I think in order for it to work you need to start fresh. Once the whole place is how you want it then it is easier to get into a routine of keeping it up. I say pick one room at a time and totally over haul it to what you want then keep it that way by finding a daily schedule that works for you. I have a set routine that I go by all the time that includes all my chores. I am a sahm. I have a son who just turned 8 and twins that will be 7 soon. I also babysit a 4yr old, 8yr old and 3 month old. It can be done!! goog luck!

I have 5 children and I always get compliments of "how do you keep your house clean". Well, I can't say that it is "clean" but it is presentable. My children were taught from very small that there are no toys allowed in the living room or kitchen the only other place is the bedrooms. Now we will get a game out and play on the table or floor but it is put up as soon as we are finished. All shoes stay in the laundray room (1 pair each) as this is the main door we come in and out. I go through their rooms at the beginning of every summer and we give to other children (ie donate). Every saturday morning the children know that it is house cleaning until 12pm; after that it is free time. We vaccum/dust/bathrooms etc. Some people think that I am strict but you have to keep order or your life will be extremely unorganized.

Flylady as a few others have said. I was the same as you, it was an endless battle everyday to keep it close to clean and now my house is always company ready and clean. I kind of adjusted Flylady to work for me don't take her lists & things word for word, adjust them for your life/family. I tried the Flylady program about 3 times and failed the first two because I tried to do just as she said instead of making her ideas work for us.
I live in a large home with 3 kids aged 8, 6 & almost 2 so they are expected to help out. If they don't want to pick up their things they get 1 warning and then I pick it up and that means trash can so they are good about it. Of course the 2 year old gets more chances, I'm not cruel lol. They don't have huge jobs but they can help.

Good luck!!!!

I have a 2 and 4 year old as well, and I feel your pain. I feel like I am always cleaning. It definitely helps to have your children help out. Both of my children actually pick up their toys because I have bins for all of their things and they know where to put things. I agree that it's a good age to make them clean up.

It's my husband that needs lessons, though! His mom cleaned up after him his whole life, so he tends to drop things on the kitchen island, in the office, on any clean surface and forget about them there. (He's a good man, though, and is making great strides.)

For me personally, there is a big difference between dirty and messy, so as long as the house is clean, I can overlook the toys that migrate into the kitchen. If my kitchen and bathrooms are clean, I'm a happy person.

We donate clothes and old toys twice a year, so that helps, too. The less you have, the less you have to put away.

Angie

I don't fully follow fly lady but I do use some of her stuff.

Like he 15 min frenzy declutter. You clean a room for 15 mins and then stop and go to the next room. It keeps you from getting overwhelmed and distracted.
You just go back to the rooms if you have not finished the first time.

[/quote]For me personally, there is a big difference between dirty and messy, so as long as the house is clean, I can overlook the toys that migrate into the kitchen. If my kitchen and bathrooms are clean, I'm a happy person.[quote]


I totally agree! I try to keep everything clean but I think when you have kids it is hard to keep things completely tidy and organized. And I can look past the toys on the living room floor as long as the tv isn't dusty and the carpet looks good I would rather spend time with my kids playing with them and enjoying them than cleaning all of the time and worrying about the mess. It isn't practical for me to not let them have toys in other parts of the house because I don't want my 2year old always having to go upstairs to play. It is easy for me to just bring the toys in the living room so I can fold the clothes or whatever, but when they get older that is a great idea. I try to organize things on the weekend and once I get things exactly how i like it, than I can keep it that way pretty easily. I would just say take little steps to try and get things how you like it, but don't stress out so much. Life is short and kids grow up so fast, who cares if your house isn't spotless all the time. That is how I look at it

I am anal retentive about everything, I clean without even realizing it. I've decided it isn't so great-it takes twice as long to do anything. I can't just wash my hands-I have to wash the sink with bleach wipes stored underneath. If I'm in the kitchen & notice a crumb, I take out my hand vacuum & do the whole floor-if I notice dust, a smudge on the window, or a crooked chair, I stop what I'm doing and take care of it. Cooking-it's the worst. I have to put everything away as I use it-even if I'm going to use it again in 5 minutes. Meanwhile, if I see the stovetop has a spot-I have to clean it before I continue cooking. It's maddening-so before you turn into someone like me, enjoy your kids while you can. The toys will always be there , but your kids grow up and eventually leave home.

As for my husband, I swear he makes a mission of leaving stray things around the house for me to pick up. Every morning he leaves a cup on the counter, and every morning I put it in the dishwasher that is less than 5 inches away. I finally asked him about it, and he said 'one day you're going to wake up and that cup isn't going to be there and instead of you worrying about why I didn't put it away, you're going to be missing me and the cup.' I never asked him to pick anything up again.

My house is always a disaster area. My husband gets annoyed because he grew up with his mother, she worked full time and would come home and clean for 4-5 hours if not longer every day. If my in-laws go camping, at those black powder shoots, she spends almost her whole weekend cleaning her camper and cooking. I get told that I should keep our camper cleaner when we go I'm also expected to help my MIL with these elaborate meals and watch the kids, then my husband starts going on about how he's taking me for a nice weekend away from the house and how it's a good break.

He gets mad at me about our room but he has stuff all over it that I don't know where to put it so why should I bother with my mess when he isn't going to do anything about his. I'll start cleaning with the promise of him taking care of his stuff, it still hasn't happened.

I get frustrated with keeping the house clean pretty easy so I give up after a while. I'm not ever going to be known as a good housekeeper.

My house usually looks like a hurricane hit it. The hurricane called my kids and my DH. I have three kids ages 3, 20 months and 10 months. The oldest refuses to even take his dishes to the sink. My husband constantly harps on my about cleaning but there is just not enough hours in the days. Besides having to chase three kids all day to make sure they don't get into anything they are not supposed to, then dishes on top of that. I don't have time to clean up the newspaper that my DH decides to leave on the living room floor. Or empty ashtrays (I don't even smoke) Plus I have to clean up after everyone that visits this house and his family is constatly over. I think if anyone can make their house look presentable but "lived in" congratulations I give you a big pat on the back. After all I could spend an entire day cleaning, scrubbing and everything else and the next day it is a war zone again. I should go on strike.

I used to have a house of complete disorder. I have since stopped picking up after the kids. My kids have 5 minutes to pick anything they have. If it isn't pick up, they have to throw it away. So either way they learned they are the ones picking it up.
If they go to school and left their things laying around, when they come home they have to clean the entire room. Even if what they left was a shirt or jacket.
I don't get so upset about bedrooms. That is a personal area. They clean it up everyday, but it isn't spotless.
I wish I had gotten on them from infant until now.

I think children create a good majority of the messes in a house, especially if they don't put theire things away in their room. My kids are all grown so I can look back on what I think worked and didn't as far as getting them to pick up based on what they tell me. My children were expected to pick up after themselves from the time they were toddlers. Initially, we only used positive reinforcement by praising them for doing a good job and so on. However, by age four if I or my husband were the ones picking up the left out toy it would go into the Salvation Army bin for children who would appreciate and take care of their things. They never saw the toy again. Even at age four they learned fast. It's something they all hated then, but every one of them plans on doing it with their kids. My oldest daughter's fiance has 10 nieces and nephews and they are all under 7. She gets very frustrated when she has them visit as they've never been taught to pick up after themselves. I thought this was funny as she was my sloppiest one. As for husbands, mine is a neat freak like me. However, my SIL cured my brother by just taking everything he "dumped" during one day and piled it on his side of the bed. When he went to bed that night he asked "What the h--l is all this?" She calmly replied "it's all the stuff you used and didn't put away afterwards." And let me tell you, there was plates with leftover food, dirty towels, you name it. He was shocked, and though he is still sort of a slob he'll pick his stuff up when he's finished now. 30 years of my mother catering to him was cured in one day!

When my grandchildren moved in it drove me up the wall to have to constantly be on them to clean up. I finally told them if they didn't put their toys,books,clothes,shoes ect... away when they were done with them I would throw them away. I wouldn't really throw them away I just put them on the top shelf of the pantry for a week or so. At first that shelf was over flowing after a month they got the hang of it. I rarerly have to put anything up there. (I used this on my honey and the grown kids as well) You just have to be consistent. As for the dirty clothes I stopped going around looking under beds and in closets if it is not in the hamper it doesn't get washed. A few days of going commando my honey got the message. They will grumble and be unhappy at first but they get over it.

I do a modified fly lady-I had to make it work for me. I have all of the routines and zones done up on an excel chart (pm me if you want a copy) and we play for points.

If at the end of a two week period I have the most points then she has to help me make some elaborate dinner (I love planning big dinners) if she wins then I have to work in her basement for an hour.

ahhhhhh... i know how it is also. A year and a half ago I was diagnosed with Thyroid cancer and Myashtenia Gravis which is a muscle disorder and causes me to get very tired, so at night it is hard for me to even pick my neck up off the couch. So I gave my husband the ultimatum that either he needs to actually help me or we need to have someone come in and help me clean. LO and BEHOLD, he hired someone to do basic stuff every 2 weeks. I still have everything else to do... laundry etc. But they clean the floors, windows, vaccum every 2 weeks. It is nice to take a load off. I still work 56 per week and have a 4 year old son, so its not like i have a maid everyday but it does help.

I agree with some of the other posters and say that I like to have a fresh clean start...the entire house clean and then keep it that way.

Now.....I have something to say here and PLEASE DO NOT flame me...it's just my opinion.

Children do need to be taught to clean up after themselves. They need to have examples from mom AND dad. If you teach them from little up to clean up after themselves you will then break the cycle ( like a DH or a DW that does not pick up after themselves( abd the spouse is behind them doing everything for them...

Now....here goes the part you ladies and gentlemen may not like......like I said it's just my opinion.....If you teach them to clean up after themselves and they are old enough to understand that this is something that is required of them to do AND they DONT do it.....that is then an obedience problem! Not....a clean up the house problem

I've found the Flylady technique works very well for me. I can do a LOT in 15 minutes! My problem is discipline though -- things start looking good and I stop being so dilligent... I guess it's whatever works for you. Granted I've tweaked her system to better suit my needs and that worked well for me. The biggest blessing I've received from it though is the time redeemed out of the day. No amount of $$ could buy that!

My son used to hate picking anything up when he was a toddler. One day I got a kitchen timer and a basket for each of us. I told him whoever picked up the most items that belonged to him or me, in five minutes wins. Of course, I made sure that he won. He loved it! We made it a game, and the house got picked up with no arguments or fights. The prize was usually something simple like a treat from the kitchen, but sometimes the prize was just praise and a high five; he was okay with either one.