Furious, Ticked, Miffed And Hurt!

Business By cakesbyamym Updated 6 Jun 2007 , 1:45am by Michele25

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thems_my_kids Posted 12 May 2007 , 1:48am
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Let us know how it turns out! I'm very curious! I also agree with everyone else. No money, no cake! A contract is a contract! Good luck!

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karensjustdessert Posted 12 May 2007 , 1:49am
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I would bet that the other vendors hired for this wedding are having this same conversation right now, and are considering pulling out of this hassle.

And Debi is very right, the MOB is looking for a reason not to pay. She's already insulted your professionalism, found fault that isn't there, and breached your contract.

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CakesbyMonica Posted 12 May 2007 , 3:01am
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I just gotta say every time I read the MOB...I automatically thought you were meaning SOB. It took me a while to realize I was thinking wrong.

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bobwonderbuns Posted 12 May 2007 , 3:02am
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CakesbyMonica

I just gotta say every time I read the MOB...I automatically thought you were meaning SOB. It took me a while to realize I was thinking wrong.




icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!! icon_lol.gificon_lol.gificon_lol.gif

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cakesbyjess Posted 12 May 2007 , 6:50am
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Amy ... I'm so sorry that you are having to deal with MOBzilla. I'm with everyone else ... bride(zilla?) signed a contract (legal, binding). I would call the bride and tell her that you need payment IN FULL (not a penny less) tomorrow, or the cake is a no go. Like others have said, if they do come through and pay you, make sure the check is good. Sounds like a nightmare. I almost hope they don't pay so you don't have to deal with them anymore. (((Hugs))) to you. Please let us know how this turns out.

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cakesbyamym Posted 12 May 2007 , 7:35am
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Thanks to each of you for the support and advice! I've just never had to deal with a situation like this. I figured that it would happen, but NEVER did I imagine it with THIS bride. She and I have e-mailed and talked many, many times since her booking in December. I guess you never know with MOB's, though.

Update...

After many, many phone calls from the MOB and FOB (I didn't answer them...had orders to deliver/work on... I cooled down enough that I could rationally and thoughtfully e-mail the bride.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Here is a copy of what I e-mailed to the bride:

Hello so-and-so,

I spoke with your mother today regarding the balance due on your wedding order. I have to be honest that I was hurt when she said that she wanted to pay the $90+ odd dollars of the balance at delivery to insure that "the cake doesn't fall apart." I have NEVER had that happen, and go out of my way with each and every order - wedding or otherwise - to insure that that never happens. I had said that I'd be willing to work with her to pay the $90+ at delivery, but after calming down and thinking rationally, I can't do that. A contract is a contract, and the balance is due two weeks prior to the wedding date. I am a business owner, and if I make the exception for one, I have to make it for everyone. I can't run a business in that fashion.

As much as I've enjoyed speaking with and meeting you, I felt that I had to contact YOU, not your mother, as the
contract was between the two of us. I did contact my supplier and she can not guarantee that all of the supplies will be here for your wedding if I wait to order later than Monday. I'd planned to order the supplies with the balance, as with all of my wedding orders. As bad as I hate to say it, if the balance isn't paid by 5/12, you will need to find someone else to do your wedding cake, as more than likely, I won't have the needed supplies in until the Friday before your wedding. That is if I order later than Monday morning, as planned.

I hope that you understand my perspective and point of view on this situation.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
During one of the phone call messages, the MOB agreed to pay $500 and leave the remainder for the delivery for "insurance." Nope.


Less than an hour after sending this, I received a phone call from the bride herself, again, I was unable to talk...back to being angry. She apologizes for her mother and says that the situation will be handled, and that it may be Tuesday before they could have the $$$ here. Not good enough. I continue working on other orders...fuming...fussing... Another hour or so goes by...ring...ring... This time, it's the groom...$$$ has been Fed-Ex'd and will be here this morning. He "hopes that this will solve the problem." We'll see if it arrives this morning and if it's the full payment. I truly wish that I'd never, ever booked this one. I'd love to get out of doing it all the way around. However, IF the full payment is received on time....today....then, I will do the very best job that I've ever done to insure that MOB is ashamed that she'd ever said such horrible things.

Thanks again everyone!!! I'll update you when/if the Fed-Ex arrives this a.m.

Amy

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LaSombra Posted 12 May 2007 , 8:40am
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looks like you handled it very well thumbs_up.gif

Good luck with this cake. I hope all goes well and it turns out beautifully. Hope you never have to talk to the MOB every again!

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amberhoney Posted 12 May 2007 , 10:17am
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waiting with baited breath - I live in fear of this happening to me!

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DesignerCakes Posted 12 May 2007 , 11:18am
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Woke up this morning, made a cup of coffee and came straight here to get an update! Please let us know if and when the Fed Ex man arrives this morning - not that you don't have more urgent things to do than keep your fellow CC'ers informed! LOL

Good luck. I wish you the best and know that your cake will absolutely ROCK. You know we've got your back!

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grama_j Posted 12 May 2007 , 11:19am
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The more I have thought about this, the more I think rather than trying to "get out of paying"..... the MOB has taken over this entire wedding, and is double checking EVERYTHING the bride has done..SHE wants control....... SHE wants the "say-so", and I'd bet she has done the same thing to everyone the bride has delt with....... the hall, the flowers, etc.
Do not allow her to do this....... stick to your guns AND your CONTRACT........ if they go elsewhere, so be it........ Did you get a deposit ? If so, and it is in your contract, KEEP it........ your time is worth something !

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cakesbyamym Posted 12 May 2007 , 11:46am
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You guys are awesome! Thanks for the support. I know that I need to call the bride back this weekend...and respond to at least one of her messages, but geesh... Right now, I don't even want to think of it. Plus, I'm working on Saturday orders right now. THOSE are my top priority at this moment...not worrying over whether they'll pay or not. Their wedding cake not being paid for is no skin off of my teeth. I have nothing at stake in it. If they want a cake...any cake at this point...they'll come through. If not, there are plenty of other orders that I can take that week to accommodate for most of what I would've made with the cake.

I guess that more than anything, I'm hurt that anyone would question my professionalism or decorating intergrity in such a rude and calous manner. Do you think that Duff accepts the remaining part of his payment COD? Heck NO. LOL Not that I'm any Duff, but please... I am a professional and this is MY business. I make the rules not the MOB's.

Okay, I'm feeling more fighty again. Gotta stop for a while. I'll keep you updated on the latest in my little soap opera as it happens. Thanks again for the support! You all ROCK!!!

Amy

PS: Now I'm using my 10-1/2 year olds phrases! LOL. "You Rock!" LOL.

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missym Posted 12 May 2007 , 11:49am
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I agree that without payment you should not do the cake. And you are right, if you do this for one client, they all will do it. Stick to the contract and best of luck to you!!

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indydebi Posted 12 May 2007 , 1:42pm
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That was a VERY well written email and obviously it seems to have gotten the results you were after. Looks like BEth's crystal ball was working ..... they DID come up with the money! thumbs_up.gif

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summernoelle Posted 12 May 2007 , 1:57pm
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Good for you! You dug your heels in, and look what happened-they paid you when you told them to. You didn't let them push you over.
I hope the wedding goes well and that they don't give you any more trouble.

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2sdae Posted 12 May 2007 , 2:08pm
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you did exactly what I would have done or suggested. That mob or sob which ever you prefer, icon_lol.gif , has no business muzzling herself right up between you and the person whom you had a contract with, no matter who that was! So pay up or NO CAKE FOR YOU!!!! birthday.gifbirthday.gifbirthday.gif

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Wendoger Posted 12 May 2007 , 2:24pm
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*waiting-to-see-what-happens*
icon_eek.gif

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mgdqueen Posted 12 May 2007 , 2:27pm
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Amy-your cakes are terrific and MOB is just having a very hard time letting go. You have handled things in such a professional manner and you have to be very proud of that.

I love your Tony avatar BTW-my favorite driver EVAH!! Go Darlington tonight!! icon_biggrin.gif

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jlh Posted 12 May 2007 , 2:34pm
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Emotions start running VERY HIGH this close to a weddding. About a week before my sister's wedding, the groom's mother called the reception place and intructed them to add extra people at the bride's family expense. She told them, "my sister had ok'd it". My sister hadn't, and thankfully, the place immediately called my sister to get to the bottom of it. We were stunned that a grown woman would pull such a ridiculous stunt. I would say that MOB is having to cough up quite a bit of money right now. Every vendor wants their payments in full. She's probably stressing over money. I believe she's laying the ground work by saying "if your cake is no good, you don't get paid". I find it sad that the poor groom had to step in a pay for the cake. Men are good like that. I would rest ASSURED that all will go well. You'll get your money, your cake will be wonderful, and I guarantee you....today, the mother of the bride will be upset about something else. Once she finds out the groom handled it, she'll move on to something else that she can get her hands on and attempt to ruin.

As painful as it was, I'd try not to focus on her comment about your cake falling apart. That was ground work she was laying to come back at you and say...I'm not paying (because I'm totally broke!!). I can also guarantee you that she just wrote a whopping check within the last few days for the reception caterer ....and she's probably dying. It has nothing to do with you, your cakes or your skill. You'll enjoy making the cake for the bride and groom...and the bride will LOVE it. Who cares about the MOB.
good luck

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lynda-bob Posted 12 May 2007 , 2:44pm
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I can't wait to see what happens, either icon_eek.gif I can relate, but I (idiot that I am) have been burned, before. Never again! You did right! thumbs_up.gif
My situation was that I made the wedding cake for my BIL's partner (they are police officers!) for only $175... I know, I know icon_rolleyes.gif It was a Five tier (squares made to look like wedding gifts- all ivory buttercream) w/ a big bow on top. We (BIL and I) delivered it and set it up (I don't do that anymore unless they pay extra). THE CHECK BOUNCED!!! Made me bounce checks in my account so it cost ME $35 in fees. Finally got paid in cash but they didn't cover my fees. I was fuming! I still have that check some four years later! icon_mad.gif At their one year anniversary my sis asked me if I wanted to make a small anniversary cake for them. icon_eek.gif I was like are they crazy!? She said, "Well you could make them pay in cash." I told her not only did they not have enough money to pay me what I'd charge THEM but they wouldn't want to eat a cake I baked for THEM icon_twisted.gif . I know I am evil icon_evil.gif but my pride would never allow me to take another order from them again! PLEASE let us know what ultimately happens and post pix. I cannot wait to see the cake should it come to fruition! icon_biggrin.gif

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imaginecakes Posted 12 May 2007 , 2:49pm
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You should be very proud of the proffessional way that you handled this situation!! I can only hope that when I get my business up and running, that I have the courage to deal with any similar situations that may arrise in a similar fashion without crumbling!!!!

I hope everything works out for you!!! icon_biggrin.gif

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cakesbyamym Posted 12 May 2007 , 2:54pm
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10:30 and nothing yet.

I am trying SO hard not to dwell on the situation and upcoming wedding, but it's not easy. I take all comments from my customers seriously and to heart. I want each and every one to be pleased with the finished products that they pick up or I deliver. I just have to remember that this MOB has never tried any of my cakes, nor has she ever been the recipient of one. I have to be honest, as upset as I was last night, I was ready to never do another wedding cake and start returning deposits from the dozen or so others already booked for this year. I have been second-guessing my abilities and questioning whether I should even be selling cakes. I know that my cakes are no where in the neighborhood of so many here on CC, but I don't think they are that bad either. I'm pretty proud of my cakes. Not all of them...but the majority. I have never dreaded something or felt so much pressure for "perfection" in all of my life. I don't like that feeling either.

Thanks again for the words of support!!!
Amy

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gateaux Posted 12 May 2007 , 2:56pm
post #52 of 123

Amy, you handled your communication with her with a lot of grace. The couple is probably trying to figure out everything and they probably realize they spent too much or that other people got involved and now they migth be having to do a lot of fixing up who knows.

Once you have done your work for the day and that the Fedex Delivery has arrived. Take a breather and then call them back on your terms. You will be more relaxed and ready to handle the situation. I suggest making small notes for yourselfs of points you want to mention.

* Contract between you and me.
* Got the payment... I will order or not...
* I will only deal with you or the groom on delivery. No in laws of any kind.

* other items you will not do.
* review all items you need and they need to provide to ensure proper set up.


I am sure many others would be able to add to this list. I think of it as pro con list. once you have it in front of you, it's easier to be rational.

I am sure you do this already, but make sure you are in contact with the venue to ensure times and set up and what the couple ordered for you to use. Just to make sure that there are no issues once you get there. Who knows what else the MOB got her nose into.

All I can say is that I am so happy when we were married that both our mothers let us do whatever we wanted and only asked us what we wanted them to help with and it was great. I feel sorry for you and for the bride.

All the best. Have a great day and dont worry about it. There is nothing else you can do until that Fedex Truck arrives.

Good Luck.

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briannastreats Posted 12 May 2007 , 3:15pm
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I also think you handled it perfectly. thumbs_up.gif I know I am very new to this, but my only suggestion to add would be that once you (hopefully) receive full payment from the (hopefully cute to make your day) fed-ex guy, call the bank to make sure the money is there, and even go to their bank to cash the check, before calling the bride to say you've received payment.

I hope everything works out for you... either way. I can't wait to hear about it!! icon_smile.gif

Brianna

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keonicakes Posted 12 May 2007 , 3:21pm
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Forgive me if this question has been addressed. If your a liscensed baker, deal only with whomever signed the contract. No one else. That's like dr patient confidentiality. Don't discuss customer finanial matters with anyone other than who signed the contract. If your not licensed, this mother sounds like someone who would turn you in just to save herself some $. Deal with only the person you have a contract with and stick to the agreement. That's what it's for so you don't have to deal with problems like this.
Off my soap box now.
Amy
Good luck sweetie.

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cakesbycathy Posted 12 May 2007 , 4:15pm
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Should the money NOT arrive today, first thing tomorrow morning call the bride. Inform her that since the money did not arrive yesterday, as stated in the CONTRACT, that she will not be getting her wedding cake from you or her deposit back.
Ignore all the begging, pleading, shouting, cursing that will follow from bride, groom, MOB, SOB or anyone else. Ignore all messages from them.
Have some chocolate and move on to your next order!

Can't wait to see what happens!

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CoutureCake Posted 12 May 2007 , 7:56pm
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I think FedEx has a tracking number, if the payment hasn't arrived, I would give a call to get the tracking number so you know it's on the way (wait until 5:00).. Let her know that if the supplies don't arrive on time because of the delay in getting the check to you to be able to order them, some design changes may need to be made.

I agree, MOB in this case is being a PITA, don't deal with her because the contract is with the bride. OTOH, if MOB signed the contract, then it's with her. But, no money, no cakey... It doesn't ruin your day if she doesn't get the supplies she needed for her design on time. Her loss, not yours! Or as my friends in collections say "NOT MY PROBLEM (you're the deadbeat)!!!"

As for the references to Duff... I played that 5x for DH to get the exact wording down... icon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gificon_biggrin.gif ... "Tell her the balance hasn't been paid by agreed upon date, cake is cancelled, we've taken other orders, and we wash our hands of your deadbeat @$$ tapedshut.gif ".. Or, something to that effect...

I have a clause that if they want to use a check, it's due in full 28 days prior to the event so it has time to bounce. Otherwise, the remaining portion of the payment must be made in CASH 14 days prior. The only thing I'll bend on is if they're not sure on those final 50 or so guests (we are in an area with 200+ for weddings is the norm) at the 28 day mark when the servings are being made in kitchen cakes for the final count when it doesn't impact the centerpiece design. BUT, all cake needs to be paid at the 14 day mark because no money, no cakey...

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Jopalis Posted 12 May 2007 , 8:17pm
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I agree with others... a contract is a contract. Be professional, calm and cool. Even if you are frazzled underneath. You know I always try to think of ramifications to decisions. Now we all know that word of mouth is perhaps one of the best if not THE best advertising. Well, say this cake resulted in more orders.... They would also get advice on how they handled you.... you don't want customers yanking your chain like that. Do you want others to do the same or other finagling with the final payment, etc. etc? Makes you look less professional too.... and a tad insecure. Portray professional coolness, friendly but business is business. Project self confidence!!! You earned it...you deserve it. Stand your ground!

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KittyPTerror Posted 12 May 2007 , 8:18pm
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It seems like something weird is going on. At first MOB gives an excuse for why they don't want to pay up and now the B&G are scrambling for the cash? I don't understand why the b&g had so much trouble with coming up with $90. I'm not saying that $90 isn't much money, it's quite a bit to me, but when I got married, we knew exactly what our budget was and all the money came out of that. They knew how much they were going to have to pay you, they already came up with $500, why are they making such a fuss over $90? Of all the other expenses for their wedding, $90 seems pretty paltry to be making a big deal out of, especially for something that is so important.

Have you decided what you're going to do if the money gets there tomorrow morning?

Can't wait to hear an update...

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Lorabell Posted 12 May 2007 , 8:28pm
post #59 of 123

In my opinion, she has had since 2006 to save the money for the cake. No money no deal. If you do do it, you probably won't get paid. Don't let her walk on you. The contract was between you and the bride, NOT the mother. I would't even deal with her. The next time she talks to you , I'd just tell her that. You don't have to be hateful, but you are running a business.

I'm on your side.

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superstar Posted 12 May 2007 , 8:59pm
post #60 of 123

Waiting to hear if Fedex arrives. You handled everything very well. It always amazes me when people behave badly, although I don't know why as we see so much of it. Keep us posted.

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