I have a friend that is being confirmed Easter weekend. My MIL said she spoke with the mans wife (who has been a family friend for well over 30 years) and she asked if I would make the confirmation cake. My MIL said to give me a call and ask. The problem is that this woman has not called me yet and probably won't because she is notorious for assuming things. If I go to the confirmation party that night and she doesn't have a cake I am gonna feel bad, but then I feel like this woman should call and talk to me personally. I don't want to upset anyone.But she did the same crap with her wedding cake last year even though I had volunteered to make her cake I could never get in touch with her and I didn't make her cake, so she had no wedding cake and she was upset..but how am I suppose to know what she wanted.I am frustrated and confused. She told my MIL that she would pay me for the upcoming confirmation cake. The thing is I know I am gonna have to give it too her at cost. I already told my MIL I will give her till Monday to call me after that sorry but I refuse to take an order from her after that. Am I being fair? Or should I make a cake just so that noone gets embarrassed? Hubby says make the darn cake and that will be our gift to him ( Ok that is a whole other issue). Another thing is that this woman told my MIL that she wanted the cake to look like her daughter's did some 20 years ago. I wasn't even around then...Geez I don't know what to do.Thanks guys for letting me vent.

Just to save face and because you WILL run into this woman again....I would give her a call....say that your MIL mentioned she'd like you to do the cake and that she'd like it to resembled the one her daughter had and just say if that's the case, you would love to do it and you could even give it to her at no charge as the confirmation gift and that you would need a photo or two of the cake she would like it to resemble....this way...you're giving her an out...if she's planning on a cake from somewhere else then she can say so when you call. I find that ordering specific cakes and so forth through other people always ends up badly. I would just say that you wanted to call because you felt so badly about the communication mix ups that you had with her wedding cake before and you didn't want to assume that because she hadn't called that she didn't want the cake and have the confirmation party end up without a cake like her wedding did!!!! I would just make sure you're coming off as helpful and not bashing her for being an incompitent cake orderer!!!!! LOL

Hi there,
First of all, breathe... (I know it's annoying to hear when you're venting, but it's worth taking a sec to take a nice deep breath. )

I can certainly see your frustation. I agree, the lady does need to call you and talk to you directly, but if she's notorious making assumptions, we can gather that she won't on this occasion either. You mentioned you spoke to your MIL and said that the woman has until Monday, but does she understand your concern? If you haven't already, maybe you could talk to her (MIL) and explain how you feel and ask if she thinks the woman is assuming yet again. Sounds like the woman and your MIL talk, so maybe your MIL could mention something to the woman, perhaps 'Have you given her a call yet?' something simple like that so when the woman says no, she can tell her she might want to call you and make sure you'll have time or tell you what she wants exactly. Or maybe respond with 'I don't know that she's aware of what you're looking for' That way if the woman is assuming, someone else can clue her in.

I hope this helps. I'm really sorry this is happening - very frustrating indeed! Hang in there and let us know how it turns out.

Take care!

Maybe you could call her & say that you heard that she wanted you to do the cake....tell her that you are filling up with orders for Easter or that you are trying to get all your orders together before then & ask her if she wants you to put her down in your book for a cake. If she says yes, then you can discuss the kind of cake she wants & then decide if you want to give it as the gift or not.

Yes, you could probably wait for her to call you, but if she is known for assuming things she might not call. While its frustrating, this is just how some people are. I have a feeling you would probably feel better if you just talked to her & got it resolved.

If this was a customer you didn't know, I would probably say wait until they call you & if they don't then don't worry about it. But since this is a friend & you know they probably won't have a cake unless you do it, I would call.

Several potential clients will tell my friend "I need a cake" (she helps me with weddings) and she tells them to call me directly. SHe tells them she doesn't know my schedule. She then gives me the "heads up".

If I don't hear from them, I don't assume I have an order. I will ask my friend what they had decided and alot of times they call, maybe, 2 days before the event.

The only I advice I can give, is "how important is she to your business?"
If she will hurt it by telling everyone that you didn't do a cake on 2 occasions--then call her. If not, then let it be until you hear from her or tell your MIL that you have not heard from her and the cut-off date for the order will be Monday. HTH--Pam

I think I would just call her and say something like this:

"MIL mentioned to me that she thought you wanted me to make the cake, so to avoid any miscommunication, I wanted to call you personally. I'd be happy to make the cake for you, but we need to have everything planned by Monday at the latest so I have time to shop for the ingredients and plan the week to accomodate your order."

Decide if the cake will be a gift, a discounted price, or full price, so if she does want you to do it, you can let her know right then what you're thinking.

My experience is that using someone else for a middleman, in communications, rarely works out as well as just making the call and talking in person.

Good luck, let us know what happens!
Laura.

I told my MIL last night that if she happens to talk to this woman to remind her that yes I need to know, because I do have 4 easter cakes to do that weekend..I also told MIL that I really don't care if I do the cake or not. This woman would not hurt my business at all. The thing that upsets me and I am sure it upsets all of ya'll is that people presume we can just pull a cake out of thin air. And yes maybe I should call the woman myself, BUT!!! she is also the type that is self centered, she thinks everything should revolve around her. She definitely gives new meaning to DRAMA QUEEN!!!! And everyone around her has stopped catering to her needs. I think for now I am gonna blow it off and not plan on the cake. Oh well thanks guys for reading and letting me vent. Times like this I wish I had a mom ( I do have one but she wont let me vent) God I sound like I am having one pity party today.(MAybe its the rain)

sI agree with every one else. Just call her. That way she cannot tell everyone that is was your fault yet again even though it was hers the first time and would be this time as well. It sounds like this is some one whom you have contact with quite often so I would do it just to show you are the more resoponsible one even though you shouldn't have to call her place her order. How frustrating! Good Luck!

How about this, if you don't want to call her & she doesn't call you, then why don't you just make whatever cake you want. This way, there will be a cake there, it could be your gift, & noone will be embarrassed. This is assuming you have time to do this. Maybe a really pretty, simple cake?