You guys are hilarious!Keep them coming...One day I was organizing my cake dummies and I had the one decorated with the cherry blossoms (in my gallery)on the kitchen table.My landlady came to fix something in the apartment and saw the decorated dummy.After a few compliments I told her it was a dummy,a styrofoam dummy.Then she asked me "and when are you going to cut the cake?" 
I was dying waiting for her to leave...
I'm sorry to be on here so much, but the more I read, the more I recall stories! 
I was at my grandparents house one day (and there's nothing funnier than old people arguing!). Gramma was reading the paper and said, "Oh they buried so-and-so today." Grampa said, "Oh did he die?" Gramma said, "NO, you fool! They buried him alive!"
I said, "cut the pieces bigger"...she said, "can I do that?"
You should have told her "I doubt it!" LOL
This reminds me of something that happened to me this morning. Not a cake story but I thought to myself "Is this guy for real?". I went to WalMart to buy some comfy cheap lounging clothes for my plane trip tomorrow. I found this really cool top and went to the register to pay for it. The guy looked all over and didn't see a price tag on it (leave it to me to grab the only one without a tag). To save time I told him I would go get another with a tag since they were virtually right behind me and no one else was at the register. So I went and got one with a tag on it and when I gave it to him so he could scan it he asked me "So, do you want both of them?" I politely said no with a big question look on my face. hmmmmmm
Lazy_Susan
Boy, you guys have some great ones. And to think I was in shock when the woman who bought my cake at the school cake sale on Dec 13 or 14 called me at home to ask if it would be ok to just hold onto it until Dec 22 and serve it to her company then?!!
ROTFLMBO!!!!!!!! You guys have me dying!!!! 
Debi~ you keep em comin girl! Don't you be sorry one little bit!! And Cassandra....same goes for you!!! No pming these allowed!!! You gotta share!!! It's the rules!!!!
Do you make the parchment triangles out of pachment paper?
Not my question. I was reading through some other thread here. I thought cake artist (This is what I'm calling myself these days) were a special breed with no faults, then I read this! I'm still perfect!
dont take comments personal
excuse us for been so hard on inmates and students
its just what we all deal with everyday .
on friday a lady comes asking for a spongebob cake and she sees all the pictures and she doesnt like any of them so i tell her well i can do this i can do that and she says ok so this saturday morning
she walks in to pick up the cake and says to me this is not what i asked for ,,,,i said i know cause you didnt even have an idea of what you wanted and this is what i told you i would do for you and you agreed ,she says ,yes but ths is not what i had in mind you would do .well, she says i didnt want to see the side of the cake... duh, how is that posible a cake with no sides and then she freaked out cause she didnt see the name on the cake, no sides and not enough space for the happy birthday i had to put the kids name on the front side. what i mean is how do people want to order a cake thats pictured in thier mind but doesnt tell us how she wanted ?im guessing she wanted a discount cause she made a big fuzz about it untill she couldnt find any thing else to complain about
finally i told her she could just leave it if she didnt want it id give her back her money ,she said then i wont have any cake for the party i said you can always go to walmart .so she took it anyways . she gave me a headache .next time i see her walking in ill just hide i dont want to deal with her again .
I'll tell on myself here. Dh and I still laugh about it every time it's foggy. I grew up in CA and got married at 17 and moved to a farm in Kansas. I had lived only several miles from the coast and always understood (from what source I don't know) that the fog we experienced rolled in off the ocean. So guess what, the first time it got really foggy here I was absolutely amazed that the fog could last long enough to get all the way to the middle of the country. Dh thought I was just trying to be funny. Boy, did he have a lot to learn about me! Mind you, I AM pretty funny. I've been dreaming up stupid questions to ask him for over 37 years now and he still gets soo serious thinking he's straightening me out. And I can come up with the most serious and ditzy arguments for his explainations. It can really get him going. One would think he'd have caught on by now. It's a crack-up. It still about puts our oldest son under the table when I get going. I can't help myself sometimes, what can I say?
I really was amazed at that fog though.
ROTFLMBO
what does this mean ?now dont laugh at this i couldnt haved picked a better place to ask im laughing my head off
i feel stupid
You're close! Only instead of laughing your HEAD off, you would be "Rolling On The Floor, Laughing My BUTT Off!"
deal w/ them every day in my "real" job ---
they're called students
Sad to day, in my experience, many of the teachers aren't much better!
(...and that includes both K-12 and university/graduate school level.)
RedPanda
I laughed when I saw this. Reminded me of a cute anecdote - not half as funny as what's already been posted to this thread - but makes me smile when I think back.......
.....to High School. Had a teacher tell us all not to forget to put our names at the top of the paper. Then added to put it on both sides. It sort of slipped out, but I asked him, "Is that in case we lose one side?" He tried not to smile, but the rest of the class was laughing. Good thing he was a very nice man (even if he thought one side of the students' pages might get lost).
rolling on the floor laughing my butt off!!! Which again is exactly what I'm doing right now!!!!
OMG, it just keeps getting worse. I work at a nursing home now, and I'll tell ya, I love my residents and it's refreshing to work around people who actually have a reason to say what they do.
G'night, Lindav76.
Okay, I just remembered two ditzy things my grandmother did many years ago.
The first one was told to me because I was too young to remember. The whole family was over for coffee and cake for someone's birthday. As usual, my grandmother made sure everyone was served before she was. She was known for being a good cook and a decent baker. Well noone wanted to say anything, so they didn't, but when my grandmother took the first sip of her coffee she practically spit it out. She said it was terrible and eventually everyone reluctantly agreed, not wanting to hurt her feelings. Well all the coffee cups were dumped, and then Grandma took the perculator and emptied that into the sink, too. The last thing to come out of the pot was the sponge that she accidentally left in after washing the pot and making the coffee!
Poor Grandma!
The other story was when my grandfather was fixing the kitchen sink. There was some sort of clog or the pipe needed to be replaced. Anyway, he had the bucket beneath the pipe to collect all the water that drained out. When it was getting full he handed it to Grandma and asked her to empty it for him. So she did. Without thinking she emptied it into the sink, thus spilling it all on his head!!
It was one of the funniest things I remember! I don't know whom to feel more sorry for, him or her. For many years after that she endured being called Edith!
my aunt use to work at a pizza hut and said it people would call in asking if the pizza could get cut into 7 pieces instead of 10. She would ask why and they would say "because 10 pieces is just too much and I don't think we could eat it all but 7 I know we can". My aunt said she was dying to say "But it's still the same amount, just bigger pieces!" She never did though because she didn't want to make them feel as dumb as they were.
My DH worked in a computer store and it never failed that someone would call in and he would be doing tech support for over and hour with nothing working! The people would get frustrated and say "I just want to get on the computer because the power is out and I can't watch tv" Because we all know when the power is out that magical beings will make our computer--and only the computers--work!
When I worked in the gym there was a sign saying "If you are unhappy with your results come see a trainer and we will help you" Well a dedicated member came storming up to me one day asking why she gained over 20 pound in one year when she is there at least 6 days a week. I had to sit her down and explain to her (because she just couldn't understand after 10 minutes of explanation) that just because you are at the gym tanning 6 days a week doesn't mean you will burn fat. That whole year she actually only worked out 3 times!!!! Yet, she tanned 6 days a week! She seriously didn't understand that either! It took me over 30 minutes to explain it to her and I'm not even sure if she walked away understanding still to this day. She seriously thought that once she walked throught those gym doors she would loose weight. I wanted to say that the tanning bulbs threw off heat but they didn't heat up enough to melt fat!
My cousin's hubby works with computers and usually helps out friends and family from time to time. On Christmas Eve he was telling me how one of my cousin's friends gave him a call and said that the computer wasn't working. He couldn't understand it because he had just been there the night before and had worked on it for about an hour or so and it was fine when he left.
She kept insisting that she couldn't even get it start up. He asked the inevitable question, "Well, is it plugged in?" She answered, "Of course! I'm not THAT stupid!"
So he went over to her house and as soon as he looked at it (after checking to make sure it was in fact plugged in), he bent down and turned on the surge protector! Computer fixed.
OK now I'll tell on myself....
I had one very blonde moment a few years back....
It was summer, we decided to walk to my MIL's house with the kids, my dh and I. In the afternoon, my MIL and I went to the mall and did some shopping. When we came back to her house, I told her: "dh must be gone somewhere, I can't see our car" all I saw was the stroller, because we were WALKING!!!! My MIL walked up the stairs with a lot of difficulties be cause she was laughing too hard.....
The more I deal with people the better I like my dogs!!
I didn't read any of the other posts but welcome to the club. I started feeling this way when one of my customers (I worked in a salon) told me that my vacation was inconvenient for her WTF! No vacation in 7 years & I used to go in early sometimes on my day off just to please people, No one ever notices the extras you do for them but the time comes you just can't do something, and oh my god their world will come to an end.
Animals are the best!
Makes me think of all the emails I got that pretty much go along these lines, "We're getting married on X date and would like a cake for about 100 people, how much would this be?" Sometimes they wouldn't even say for how many, or they don't give the date. Then I would have to email back asking about flavours, design, coverings (fondant or buttercream) etc, and the worse part is that sometimes I don't even hear back, I guess they just want a price quote but without that info I can't give them one! I had the info listed that I needed to give a quote on my website, but it wasn't working, so I've put the questions in a more prominent place. I've also included starting prices per serving, so they KNOW it isn't going to be less then what's listed, hopefully all of this is going to help!
I have a quick one that is cake-related...
someone specifically ordered a chocolate cake with chocolate fudge filling. I told her it would be very rich but she insisted. When I asked her how it was, she said great, but it was a little too chocolately. DUH.
Some people...
I could add a ton of other stories about dumb people but I love reading everyone's stories--they make me feel not so alone...
These are hilarious !!!
My husband owns a tire compnay named Blythe TIRE CO. We have people call all the time asking..."Do you sell tires?" No....what part of TIRE CO. you reckon they didn't understand?
I love the one from sugar_plum_fairy about the incident with Grandma and Grandpa and the sink.......I did a similar thing to my husband....Our toliet was clogged up so he got under the house and took the pipes apart to get rid of the clog, well of course while he was under there I had to go....I forgot totally about him being under there and flushed the toliet...well needless to say it wasn't long before he was out from under there !!!hahaha I can't stop laughing...
I usually just lurk, but I've got a good one too! One of my good friends who is also a co-worker finally got a cell phone last year. The first day she has it, it rings at work and she goes over to her purse and starts fumbling through her purse and can't find it and then says,
Darn I must have left it at home!
We couldn't control ourself!!
This is the same woman whose daughter bought a new home and was excited that it had it's own parking lot (driveway). The fruit don't fall from the tree!!
My SIL . . .
"There's really carrots in carrot cake? Is that why they call it a carrot cake? Then why do they call zucchini bread zucchini bread?"
Yes, she's a natural blonde!
Debbie
edited to add ~ and a 4th grade teacher! Which reminds me - she just couldn't understand why she had to learn so many things just to be a teacher. . .
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